Run No. 1452 6th June 2012
Venue: Chez Sis et Fliptop
Beer: Dark Ale, Light IPA & Cider
Membership: Not run around the seven Hills!
Well it was a grand turnout for this Bank Holiday Tuesday Diamond Jubilee Garden Party R*n, her Maj would be proud if she wasn’t busy at St Pauls with the end of the four day holiday!
There was plenty of bunting & flags in the back garden of Chez Sis et Fliptop to greet the Pack as they entered the venue, there were plenty around the Royston area. Pepé le Pew arrived holding a large flat box which made him look like he was a Pizza delivery boy!
There was also plenty of Red White & Blue on show as 99% of the Pack wore these colours in various forms, some like No Eye Deer & Pepé le Pew were adorned with Union flags to add to the effect! Port & Starboard were wearing Union Flags painted on their faces & very smart they looked too. But, there was one who wasn’t decked out like the rest & that was Porky Pie, he sported a green Irish Rugby Shirt!
At lest Porky’s Rugby shirt was cleaner than the Hashit, which ARP was none too keen on putting on, she was even less enamoured at the suggestion that she put it on beneath her Patriotic Red shirt! She managed to untangle the Hashit & it seemed to be quite blue & furry at the front, maybe this was because it had been screwed up & left in a bag since she was awarded it over a month ago!
Anyhow, the pack were eager to get on, especially as they saw the arrival of various delicious looking dishes for the tea party afterwards, which left them salivating like Pavlov’s dogs. The time passed by 11:00Hrs, eventually the GM got around to calling the Circle together, when he did, he managed to get the R*n number correct.
The Hare stepped forward to explain what the Pack could expect on find out on the good streets of Royston, it was a rather short speech as he just warned of being careful while crossing roads, that there were short cuts, plus a red herring of the length of the Trail, then the Pack were ushered away out of the cul-de-sac & right to head down Green Drift.
The pace was not the fastest to begin with, perhaps the previous couple of day’s celebrations had taken their toll? For the RA, who had not been long back from his overseas expeditions, he was feeling a bit under the weather due to picking up a cold, so it was a slow start for him too. Crispy Bush was at the rear as well, & too much of his rear was on show as his ‘builder’s cleavage’ was there for all to see before he hitched up his pants, Hyena would have been proud of that display!
A CHK was found down Green Drift, opposite the T-Junction with Mackerel Hall lane, after a short bit of confusion with the Falsies further on & off on a footpath over toward the Railway line, the likes My Lil’, Sludge, Skip, Sloppy Seconds & Pepé le Pew were all quickly on to the Trail as they followed the Dust up Mackerel Hall lane to the main Baldock road.
Another CHK was found on the Baldock road, Sparky was among the FRBs who were soon over the road & on to the edge of The Heath. A few of the Keenies were dotted about out over the heath until the Trail was picked up on the path leading up beside the Club House of Royston Golf Club, outside of which a Union Flag a top of the flag pole was proudly fluttering in the strong breeze.
The Keenies began to pull away as the middle order of Slug, Port, Starboard, Six Pack & Two Timer all started off down Heath avenue, but the Hare had put in plenty of tricky devices to keep the FRBs occupied. Many thought that they would now be led up the hillside of the heath, this turned out not be the case, so their thoughts turned to the option that the Trail would gain height up the steep track of Briary lane, as it has done many times in the past! It would not!
The Keenies would now not get too far away as they made their way back to pick up the Trail off down an alleyway opposite the end of Heath avenue, now the Pack would be taken around the back streets of Princes Mews & then via more alleyways to finally come out on to the end of London road, not far from the bottom of Market Hill!
If the Hare had been cruel with threw Keenies earlier, he was more ruthless with the drinkers by taking them near to the Green Man, The Chequers, the Boars Head & the Chequers, all of which were open at 11:00Hrs on this Bank Holiday Tuesday! Mr X hung back & with Slug as they guided the horrors over the crossings to follow he Dust over by the bus Station & around on to the Barkway road. Drivers of passing cars hooted their delight at seeing the Pack dressed so patriotically (Well almost all of the Pack!)
The Tail of the Keenies could just be seen going around the bend & up the Barkway road, by the time the middle order made it to the straight line of the road, Six Pack & the RA were just far enough ahead of the rest to see that they FRBs had emerged from Bedlam Avenue further up the road, having been taken down a footpath which would start a loop out around a newish estate.
The Pack crossed the road as the footpath on one side ceased, now they made their way up the long steady hillside of the Barkway road, the Pack would find a Held CHK at the junction for Limekiln close. This was the first time & only time the Pack would have an uphill section to climb up. Which is unusual for a Royston R*n.
While waiting at the Held CHK, the Hare was questioned as to the lack of any sweets, even sour old ‘Lucky Arsenal’ ones would have done, but the Hare said he hadn’t brought these acid drops as he didn’t want the Pack to spoil their appetites for when they got back to the Garden Party!
Pepé le Pew arrived at the Held CHK & he continued his conversation with Porky Pie about not wearing any Red, White & Blue! Others had more important things to discuss, such as the event that will happen in Brussels in July 2014, as well as other things InterHash & Great Hash Migration!
As soon as Hyena was in sight on his way up the hill, the Hare allowed the Pack to start searching again, he added that those who wanted a Short Cut should stay with him, while the FRBs should search for the Trail. Sludge, Sloppy Seconds, My Lil’ & Pepé were among those who found the Falsie down the footpath through one of the strips of plantation that run from the top of the hill down to the Newmarket road.
The Long Trail was picked up heading back from this & on through the pine wood running along the back of the homes of the Brambles & Sorrel Close. The Path weaved its way on a snaking desire line between the pine trees, a CHK was found at the opposite end, but no one ventured out on the path across the open farm fields to the east.
2-1-2 Maureen took the long option, as did the RA & Six Pack, it also seems that Hyena would take this option as well, it would take him quite a while before he came back Inn! The likes of Sludge, My Lil’, Pepé le Pew, Porky Pie & No Eye Deer all made short work of finding the Trail from here.
The Dust soon lead down on a long trot through another of the strips of plantation, there was a slight diversion as it briefly came out on to the tarmac where its course crosses a small part of the edge of the estate, there a CHK was found. It was more or less a straight run down through the second part of the tree line to the Newmarket road & those with local Knowledge knew this & were soon down on the level.
Slug, Paxo, Crispy Bush, Pebbledash, What Mother Says & the rest of the horrors all took the short cut, with the Hare, also with them were Psycho, Party Animal & Little Hole & they would meet up with the Keenies as they made their way westward along the Newmarket road on the way toward the Town centre. The Trail changed direction at the roundabout where the old cinema used to stand, now the Trail headed northward on the Melbourn road.
As the Trail made its way up & over the Melbourn road, No Eye Deer seemed to have lost her bearings, fortunately she was with Mr X & Six Pack, both of whom knew where they were going as they followed the Trail off on to the footpath in an alleyway beside the grounds of St Mary’s primary school. This shaded path changed direction slightly as the Pack passed by the kink in its route out to the Green, Six Pack showed No Eye Deer the way out on to Mill road & then the short way on to Kneesworth street.
No Eye Deer still seemed confused as she was led out by the White Bear & then over the road to reach to start of Green Drift, even then she didn’t seem to recognise where she had parked up!
The GM was very eager to get things going with the Circle, but Hyena was going to be a long way off. Still at least Sludge could entertain himself as he watch T-B-T OBE fall over as he put his foot down a hole in the back garden, the sound of the clatter of the falling tent poles he was carrying gave his tumble away to the RA!
The Down-Downs took place when Hyena made it back, these saw the Hare awarded for an excellent Trail that never taxed the Pack with any of the steep climbs it could have! Other Down-Downs went to: Pepé le Pew, ARP & Puddles all for receiving their tankards for reaching their 100th Runs with Herts, most had achieved the number some weeks ago!
Porky Pie was out for wearing Green on the Trail, though he had changed in to Red, White & Blue for the Circle, the RA recalled that he wore the Cross of St George as a knight in ‘Sliver’ armour at the Herts 25th Weekend! Hyena was out as he was wearing shiny new shoes!
Sloppy Seconds was rewarded for his standing in while the RA was overseas, & for producing the trash, it was even printed in colour (Red, White & Blue) for the Jubilee! T-B-T OBE was in for his Tumble in the garden. Sis was awarded her Down-Down for being the hostess, later on the cider that the GM had poured out for her Down-Down, seemed to go to her head, much to the embarrassment of What Mother says!
Slug was out for his sterling effort in painting Union Flags on Port & Starboards faces. Pepé asked the RA how the Union Jack gets its name? Simply the use of the name Union Jack comes from when the Union Flag is flown on a Royal Navy vessel, where they have Ensigns, Jacks & Flags, now it has become common for the Union Flag to be called a Jack on land!
Sparky was out for wearing what looked like his underpants on the outside of his Long-john like leggings, he had also taken a tumble while out on Trail & a brown streak on his white long –johns was testimony to this, well we hope it was?
Finally the Hashit went to Hyena after the RA had bumped in to Sofa & Tone Deaf, they told him of their meeting with Hyena & TC in Nairobi Airport. The conversation went along the lines of “What are you two doing?” to which the reply was “We’re getting a cab to our hotel!” later on TC & Hyena mentioned that their hotel was near to the venue for the Great Hash Migration.
It was only then that Tone Deaf realised that TC & Hyena thought that they could get a cab from Nairobi Airport to the venue in Mombasa, this is a mere 330 miles as the crow flies! So, Hyena & TC had to get return flights with Kenya Airways in order to reach the Great Hash Migration Weekend!
The Pack tucked in to some splendid food, especially the Gala pie Sis made. There was plenty of grub as well. The Horrors now began to paint themselves unsupervised, most of them ended up looking like they had been up a chimney or down a coal mine! They weren’t even put off by the sight of the GM dressed up in his school boy outfit, the RA wondered if he was supposed to be Angus Young from AC/DC?
Meanwhile at the opposite end of the garden Pebbledash soon lowered the tone, & the conversation turned to the subject of fellatio & the slang names for it! Pepé le Pew was sure 2-1-2 Maureen would have all the answers to this!