Run No. 1469 30th September 2012
Venue: The Woodman
Beer: Brentwood Red; Greenjacks’ IPA; Buntingford Ice Bear; GK Abbott
Hare(s): My Lil’
Membership: Going wild over the Hill!
The day was overcast & there was a chilly breeze in the air for this day’s trail, but at least it looked as if the rain would hold off & it would prove to be so. The RA & Hare Raiser cycled over to the venue, this was to try & burn off the effects of the previous day’s F.U.K Full Moon in Colchester. Hyena went along to that Saturday event but it had taken its toll on him & he wasn’t going to show for the Herts Hash!
The Grand Monkey called the Circle to order, as reliable as ever he got the Run number correct & there were a few titters as he mentioned the 69 part of 1469, Pebbledash & the RA amongst those who found this highly amusing! The Hare was called forward & as per usual there were a few underlying boos as he started his spiel.
A few were surprised when My Lil’ produced a bag of carrots from which the pack were to give to the horses as some kind of ‘toll’ to allow the Pack to pass through their field unhindered! So, the Pack started off by heading out of the car park & through the gate allowing access in to the equine paddock.
Ewok was in her element as the nags came over to see what was on offer, the Keenies didn’t hang around as they took advantage of the kids feeding the horses, the FRBs led the way diagonally in a south-easterly direction over to the opposite kissing gate, even if it was at a walking pace to start with as the paddock was a bit rough under foot.
Once the Trail came out onto the edge of a crop field, the footpath led over the harrowed soil, at least it wasn’t ankle-turning stuff over the soft underfoot terrain. Pepé le Pew was first to the point where the path turns to the east behind the end of the finger of wooded outcrop. Sloppy Seconds was up with Pepé le Pew but both stopped as the path ran through the area of old corn that has been left set aside for the local wildlife.
Sludge & Skip were quick to point out that there was only one footpath in this field & it headed out over to the hedgerow that runs along the edge of Cum Cum lane [Yes Pebbledash it really is called that!- - Ed]. Over the crop field & then out through the hedgerow to be directed across Cum Cum lane to the footpath running northward in to Essendon.
Sludge & Sloppy soon got ahead of the rest as they ran up to the bend in the road by the old village hall, a CHK was found on the driveway down to Warrenwood House, opposite the entrance to Camfield Place, which is the former home of Barbara Cartland.
Sludge & Sloppy were soon heading off down the driveway to Warrenwood house & the stables but this would be a Falsie down there, Pepé le Pew & Sparky would follow on behind these two down this route, but of all of them only Pepé le Pew was to run back up the hill & follow the Trail properly.
Meanwhile Skip & Mr X couldn’t hear any calling from those ahead of them & they were not sure whether or not to follow on, but then they had a stroke of luck as the Hare marked the Trail over to the Camfield Place side of the road, over they went to run down the Essendon road only a short way to find a CHK by the entrance to Camfield farm. The RA & Skip must have thought that they could out-fox the Hare here & believed that he would take them down Hornbeam Lane across the road.
Dust was found on the driveway down to the east, but just as they came down to the couple of homes on the right, the RA found a T! On the way back up to the Essendon road Sludge, Sloppy Seconds & Sparky all came out on to this drive after they had short cut down from the parallel path, further back up the hill that leads to Warrenwood House.
Sludge was now very vocal, far more than when he had found Dust, he was trying to get in every excuse that he could to the RA, he mentioned ‘No sign of Dust’, he also claimed that there nothing was there to stop them taking the short cut & a host of other things including the price of fish!
Back to the Essendon road & the Hare had marked the CHK, Pepé le Pew made sure that the RA knew about Sludge, Sloppy & Sparky all short cutting, the RA had already witnessed this first hand!
The Keenies now followed on behind Paxo, Backpack & Spillage as they made their way down the avenue of Horse Chesnutt trees. Fliptop had stopped along here as he took advantage of picking up fallen conkers for the annual Herts Conker competition, Backpack & co all stopped to help him out with gathering them up. Apparently it hasn’t been a good year for the conker crop, the lack of water means that there aren’t many large ones about!
The Dust led on to the end of the avenue in to Camfield Farm, a right-hand turn in the path’s route would now lead them through Duncan’s wood as the Trail took to a hardcore capped drive down to the north. As the way dropped down in to the valley the pack would lose some 120 feet in height on the way down in to Panther’s wood.
The RA was now trying to catch up with Pepé le Pew & Sparky, as he did so he would run up behind Pebbledash & 2-1-2 Maureen. These two Harriettes stopped & Pebbledash commented on 2-1-2 Maureen’s question on who was behind them, she turned & glanced at the RA & said “It’s only Mr X coming up behind us!” in a double-entendre fashion!
Mr X came down in to Panther’s Wood to find a very fresh looking CHK, the Hare had to replace this after some numpty had pointlessly kicked this out. At the choice of paths, Sparky & Pepé le Pew were already heading eastward in the wooded valley bottom but this would prove to be false.
The RA chose the opposite route, egged on by the Hare marking the CHK. Sloppy Seconds & Sludge were already up that way but you never would have guessed as there was still no calling at all from these two. Perhaps they should join a silent order of monks?
The Trail came out through the narrow gap between the southerly Bath wood & the northern Long wood, having crossed over the wooden bridge over the Wildhill stream the route now began to steadily climb up the edge of a crop field, on the way the Pack would pass by a family out walking.
The footpath would lead on to a CHK on the wide hedged-in farm track running from north to south, so, while the likes of Sludge, Sloppy Seconds, Pepé le Pew, Sparky & Mr X all set off to the north, the Hare marked a Short Cut to the south.
After a long climb the path turned to the west as the hedged-in path made its way out beside the Candlestick Pub, out on the lane & an arrow direct the Pack down West End lane, this would be quite a long trot along the tarmac as rustic lane descend in to the valley before making its way up Wildhill to meet up with the Short Cutters Trail that ran through Harefield wood.
The RA managed to catch up with the very tail of the Pack as they came out of the Short Cut & on to the West End lane, Paxo, Ewok, Backpack, Spillage & Psycho were just ahead of him as they reached a CHK point at the edge start of the uncapped track of Green Street, just on the bend in the lane. On the way the RA once more passed by the family out walking.
At the start of Green street, Paxo asked the RA if the quickest route back was straight down Wildhill on the narrow West End lane down to the hamlet of Wildhill, it was & as Psycho’s knee was playing up she took that option. Backpack also went that way, after he had a sweet from the bag that his Dad was offering them from, this left Paxo & Ewok to continue on with the Trail, or so they thought.
The RA began to make up lost ground from the long loop out to the Candlestick, ahead of him he could see Fartin Martin & Dragon’s Den on the track out west ward & around to Woodside Place, but all of a sudden everyone up ahead of him stopped, then some were seen to becoming back! Were they coming back to take to a Footpath off of this route? Nope, the Hare had been crafty enough to lure all of the FRBs, plus most of the Pack along a very long Falsie by going up there himself!
There were a few choice words mentioned about the Hare’s parentage as the Pack turned about, at least Paxo was still dishing out the sweets to placate those who had been dragged a long way out to the west, over the back end of the Salisbury Estate of Hatfield House. The Hare now wrote out ‘On Inn’ where the track joins West End lane down to Wildhill, the Trail would now be marked down the hill on the lane back in to the hamlet that Psycho was sent down earlier.
Sloppy Seconds seemed concerned that he would have to negotiate another hill, but the Hare reassured him that there was a slight rise at the very end of the lane, & there is. The Pack ran down the narrow rustic lane, the RA passed by the family out walking for the third time & final time that morning, they would meet up again in the Woodman!
On the way back Inn, the Pack passed by a load of fly-tipped rubbish before coming out to the junction in to the hamlet, a left turn brought them back to the Pub. Some went straight in to the Pub, in order to beat any queue & probably get first dibs at the Bar Snacks!
Spotted Dick & Custard then appeared as the Pack took to sitting in the small back side room in the Pub, there’s not a lot of space in this Pub at the best of time, let alone on a Sunday lunch time when the locals are in there. It was noticed that 2-1-2 Maureen was not in there, it turns out that she was happily sitting outside in the Beer Garden.
Pebbledash soon got around to lowering the tone by declaring that she had “Stroked an Elephant on Saturday!” which had Ewok amongst others in stitches. Then she had a ‘Lesbian experience’ as Dragon’s Den was encouraged to lean forward, while wearing a low cut dress!
The Down-Downs saw the Hare rewarded for a Trail that only took the FRBs just under the hour & most were back only a few minutes afterward! Lost property of Psycho’s kit bag, saw her have a Down-Down. Pebbledash for her Elephantine stroking! Sparky was out for not getting over the Trail not spotting the Trails change to across the road from the Red Cow, so he was presented with his Hit & a £20 Specsavers Voucher, but if he can read the small print he’ll find though it is valid until 2013, it can not be used by the over 60’s!!!
The final hit went to the RA as it came to light that he was blamed for a road-rage incident, he did point out that Fartin Martin also shouted out the word ‘Wanker’, but hey-ho the Pack weren’t interested in Farts getting a Hit!