Date = 28th July 2014
Run Number = 1570
Venue = Pig & Whistle
Beer = The Gate Summer Ale
Hares = Sludge
Runners = 11
Virgins = 0
Visitors = 0
Après Hashers = 0
Newies = 0
Hounds = 0
Total = 11
Membership = Who - out there in the Fields
The Curate was last to arrive and had to park around the corner from the pub. On his return the circle had formed. Grand Master Tent Packer tried to tell a joke (needed explaining to most) and, and, and, and, and introduced the run.
Once he had welcomed one returnee – Friar Tuck from Lim-arse-ole, he invited the Hare to step forward. This was Sludge who noted the usual signage before pointing out the route through the alley beside the pub.
Off set the pack turning right into Brookfield lane. Here the front runners Curate and Friar Tuck set off up the road before finding a bar. In the meantime Paxo and Porky Pie had started scouring the playing field but not far enough. Having been called back by the Hare, the trail was found behind the hall heading off in a northerly direction between the school and playing field.
A long trek along the hedgerow to an open field found the next check. Here the pack split numerous ways, No Eye Deer to the right, Tent packer across the field and Paxo and Porky Pie to the left. After checking the small copse to the left the trail was found to be left and right from the check.
By this time Skip and Psycho were the front runners – well walkers and No Eye Deer worn out having guessed wrongly for quite some trail time.
A series of kissing gates ensued, leading through the fields besides Long Lane in the direction of New Wood and Aston End. The usual double entendres could be heard regarding the Kissing gates and at one such entry Sludge decided to play gooseberry [They're Hairy! - Ed] as he joined the Curate and Ewok trying to squeeze through the gate – together. Curate was recalling the roast he had had for dinner on Sunday!
High above the valley the trail eventually turned for home following the paths through and alongside the fields besides the brook. Here Paxo told the Curate and Friar Tuck of the time many moons before that he had set a long, long, long falsie up the hill opposite and into High Wood. He seemed to recall it with glee. Curate wondered if those taking it at the time agreed with these sentiments.
Eventually the long haul alongside the brook, punctuated by many checks, broke out into Bennington Lane. Here the front runners who had now been caught up by Zing-a-long were signalled straight across by the Hare who was some distance behind. Little did they know it was a trap.
For when Sludge and his walkers reached that very same point, he short-cutted them up the road and over the hill to the pub. Meanwhile the FRB’s consisting Tent Packer, Paxo, Friar Tuck, Zing-a –long and Sloppy Seconds ( said I’d give everybody a mention) turned at the end of the field to climb the hill. Through the very last field and along a hedged path to find the ON-INN marked in Aston Bury Road.
Sludge – for a fine trail
No Eye Deer – for – well - being Hash cash. She responded that it was her ‘pleasure’; and doing hash cash as well !
Friar Tuck – not so much for being a returnee as for running every false trail possible (not by design)
Psycho – got a Down-Down for suggesting we have too many Down-Downs (this occurred earlier during a discussion about depleting funds and price increases)The last person to be down – rather than have a Down-Down was Paxo, who having challenged the Curate to a game of pool was beaten 2 – 0. So down was he in the second game, the Curate having sunk 7 balls on the trot, that he committed suicide on the black. He won’t learn!
Curate who is not a bad loser but loves winning felt he had to record this in the Hash Trash for posterity, or at least until he wins next time around