Date =                           1st February 2015

Run Number =            1600

Venue =                       The Old Bell Gate

Location=                    Hemel Hempstead

Beer =                          Tring Red Shank

Hares =                         Foxy (With two little assistants!)                     

Runners =                    21

Virgins =                       0

Visitors =                      0                                        

Après Hashers =         0

Newies =                       0

Hounds =                      0

Total =                          21

Membership =            Some were off on their trollies!


            The Chief Hare this week was a ‘Virgin Hare’ & there were those who wondered how they would do getting around this Trail?  Fear not gentle reader as there was a fall-back for the Hare with Lemming & Mother lending their support when Foxy laid the Trail, though according to Lemming that they really didn’t have to so much!

            Foxy was concerned that the RA & Hare Raiser may have seen the start of the Trail as they walked up from the old town High Street, but Mr X said that he would remain quiet on the fact that they had spied some pink tinted flour on the climb up St Mary’s street.

            A few were wondering where Sparky was this week, as he wasn’t there to give Foxy a lift?  Well, he had a runny nose after going to Lanzarote where it seemed to be wet & damp, a contrast to the gloriously bright, if a little cold morning for today’s Hash!  Does Sparky’s nose run in his family? Was one witty line about his absence.

Tent Packer called the Circle to order, then it was over to the Chief Hare, who really didn’t know what to say to the Pack about what they would encounter ‘On Trail’ until it was coaxed out of her that there would be some roads to cross & that ‘normal Herts Markings’ would be involved, then the bombshell of ‘Three & On!’ was drooped!  At least the shock was dampened with the mention of a ‘Beer Stop’ & this was cheered by those who dislike ‘Three & On’ markings.

The first CHK was outside of the Old Bell Gate Pub & from here the Pack began to search, My Lil’ decided that he would head straight back down St Mary’s road from where he had seen the Dust earlier, sure enough the Trail would head that way, but at the junction with one of the many passageways that crisscross & link these old back streets on the rising east side behind the High Street, My Lil’ would now go wrong as he headed off on a northern choice.

It took a while before the FRBs located the Dust through a cut-through to the adjacent George Street, they would take this & descend the parallel road westward down to the High Street in the old town of Hemel.  The Pack came out to the olde Worlde part of town with its timbered old Pubs & shops, which is a stark contrast to its neighbouring new town center of concrete modernity. 

The RA noticed, then pointed out to Lemming on the way through the courtyard coaching passage way, the rare bit of Pudding Stone that was a part of the walls of the Bell Pub.

Lemming made sure that the walking wounded (Mr X) would find his way as the Trail passed by the Memorial Cross then down the stone steps & through to the grounds of St Mary’s Church.  The Trail passed through the Churchyard.

The Pack were now in the former grounds of the old Charter House, somewhere along the line Grease Lightning, Kerry & Helen had all gone astray with the Matthew, the Hares mistakenly thought that no one was lost until these four came in to sight!

Sludge & Tent Packer headed northward on a Falsie, on their return Skip pointed out to them & TBT OBE the Crazy Golf course in the middle of Gadebridge Park, he asked if this was suitable for the Herts Hash Hackers, with a couple of them being regulars Hackers they seemed to be all in the belief that the Crazy Golf would take place the next day at Whitehill Golf Club.

As the Trail was picked up beside the walled garden of the old Charter House, a quick peek in to the well kempt grounds before carrying on to the south & then following the Dust around behind the Bowls Club pavilion, No Eye Deer took advantage of using the public toilets in the park while the Pack now headed northward up through the center of Gadebridge Park, many of them passing by the small footbridge to the left as they were lead on by Lemming.

Those like My Lil’, Sludge, Tent Packer, Sloppy Seconds, Helen, Matthew & Ewok who had gone astray now got back on course as they returned to the footbridge over the river Gade on a footpath off of a 90° angle to head westward.  The Hare had made slight mistake of not putting a Bar CHK down to stop the Pack from taking the proper route down to the reed beds & through the river to reach the west side of the park, there weren’t many going to be many wet Hash boots by the ned of this Trail.

Mr X & Sloppy Seconds went down & followed the Hare’s example in wading through the fairly shallow river, but no one else would, Psycho & No Eye Deer were more than reluctant to go through the water course & baulked at the idea!  The RA said that he now had more than an abundance of Down-Down candidates to select from at the end of the Trail.

The Dust led on under the Leighton Buzzard road to the west side of the green open space.  A CHK was found be on the opposite side of the underpass, here there would be a slight problem as most headed away to the south.  Somehow the RA, No Eye Deer & Psycho were not as convinced as the likes of Crispy Bush, Skip, Kerry, Grease Lightning & Helen who all followed Tent Packer, Sludge & My Lil’ off on a long False Trail, this may have been ‘Three & On!’ which meant that the Pack would take their eye off of the ball, whether it was talking or just not looking for Dust to go along way down the road without finding a T to turn them back.

Meanwhile No Eye Deer had picked up the Trail as it headed northwestward up over the grass bank toward the housing estates on top of the plateau, there another CHK was discovered by the edge of Gade Bridge lane.  No Eye Deer fell for the Falsie up in to one of the small estates, she would come back with Mr X once they realized the true nature of this part of the Trail.

Dust was discovered on the next section of green space as the Trail continued on a north bound route to come down to Galley Hill road, care had to be taken as to where to tread on this section of the Trail as it seems that the Mr & Mrs Hemel take their pooches out along here & don’t know how to pick up & bag their mutts’ poop!  One woman let her hound crap on the grass in sight of the Pack as they made their way up the hillside, & she obviously had no intention of scooping the poop to put in any of the multitude of red waste bins along the route.

Having successfully dodged the canine landmines, the Trail led over to a CHK on the edge of the shallow embankment was found by Galley Hill road, on the path below a bag of dog poop was seen lying there - which proves that some of the good people of Hemel almost have got the idea of what to do with their pooches waste.  They just need practice dropping it in a bin.

From the CHK, Psycho & Mr X crossed over to the final section of Gadesbridge Park on the west side of the main road.  A footpath was found within Home wood & the RA made his way up through the meandering Shiggy path just within the tree line, where he found Dust.

Psycho stuck with the outside route along the wood’s edge until the reaching the CHK by a wider entrance in to the wood at the northwest corner of the open area.  Mr X would continue along northward in to the end of the woodland, stopping & turning back when he reached the fence stopping access out of the plantation & to the fields beyond.  He turned back to find Sludge & Matthew were following on behind him.

Back out to the open green space to find those who had fallen foul of the Falsie several CHKs back on the Trail were now following on behind Psycho who had fallen for the Falsie directly eastward along the field’s edge.

She had come back & they were now all heading diagonally over the green hillside & back down to the Leighton Buzzard road. 

At the end of the decent, Sloppy Seconds decided to peer in to the tall solitary bush before reaching the roadside, the RA wondered what he was eyeing up in there?  The Pack safely crossed the busy road at the roundabout junction with Galley Hill road & the Link road, Sludge & My Lil’ continued on by the arrow of where the Pack were directed through the hedgerow & into the sports ground on the opposite side. 

It was busy in the park with several kids soccer games taking place, & each was complete with vocal parents all barking out their opinions on playing skills to their offspring.  A cheer went up, not for Sludge & My Lil’ coming back after Paxo’s attempts to get them back on Trail, oh no, it was down to a goal being scored. 

Sludge & My Lil’ were found up on the Piccott’s End road, they had missed out the part where the Trail had the Pack clambering up through the tree lined bank to the stone wall along the Piccotts end road.  The Pack came out through a broken section of the stone wall to cross the road & head westward up through the new walk in the young plantation below the more established Howe Grove wood to the south of the link road, no doubt the new plantation is to cut the road noise from drifting over to the homes in the Highfields area of Hemel?

Somewhere along this part a group of FRBs went astray as they lost the Trail from the CHK by a small open sports area.  Mr X, My Lil’, Sludge, Sloppy Seconds, Tent Packer & TBT OBE all took to the streets of the Highfields area of town, some of them knew where Foxy lives & decided that they would check it out on Paston road, leaving Paxo standing on the edge of Fletcher Way.  Paxo went back to join the rest of the Pack on Trail.

As the splinter group of FRBs searched Thrift Field road, they passed by two kids playing on two abandoned trollies that looked to be from a builders merchant, but neither had any company logos on them.  TBT OBE’s eyes now lit up at the sight of a potential wheeled play thing now being abandoned, he was soon pushing the heavy, metal framed platform along the street & it was making a right racket.

The Grand Monkey decided that he too would have some fun & he jumped upon the platform to be pushed along, the clattering metal sound & the sound of the two having a jolly jape was soon cut short at the section where the end of the road has a pedestrian bit to separate it from the next street, suddenly there was an almighty crash & a sharp ‘ouch!’ & a lot of groans from Tent Packer as TBT OBE pushed the trolley in to the low kerb.

The Splinter group now found that they were right upon the beer stop, so believing that the Trail would come in via the other back streets to Randall Park, but they were wrong as the rest were all taken along to the Nicky way, the former Railway linking Hemel Hempstead to Redbourn & then Harpenden to Luton.  This would be a long trot for the Pack along near to the Link road once again, then out near to the Rugby Club before joining the Nicky Way line.

Meanwhile at the Beer Stop the small group were getting cold waiting for the Pack, TBT OBE managed to get the back gate open & the splinter group started asearching the sheds for Beers, sadley nothing was found & M rX was surpised that none of the neighbours had called the Police thinking the Hashers were burglars!  The trolley was left there on the patio garden. 

My Lil’ & Mr X were now getting bored & decided to search for the Trail coming Inn to this point.  While milling about at the front of the building, the front door opened to reveal a man with no shirt on & the RA apologized if the noise disturbed him, but he was opening the door to let a young lady out!  The man ignored the RA!

After a bit of searching for the direction the rest would come to the Beer Stop from, it all got too much for Mr X, who had cold wet feet [As He did go through the river crossing! – Ed] & he needed a pee, so it was a short walk around from the corner of Randall park to go back to the On Inn.

My Lil’, Sludge, Tent Packer & TBT OBE had already set off there, when they did arrive Milf & Kylie were found outside of the Pub, once changed & inside they soon found Crispy Bush & Skip already ensconced within the Pub!  How they got there was not established but they were keen on joining the others, who were now changed & in dry footwear, on a walk back to the Beer Stop. 

Mr X told Crispy Bush & Skip it was left up the final bit of the hill & then right along opposite the park, so when Mr X walked back it was a surprise to see these two wandering in the estate before the park!

The rest of the Pack were beginning to leave the Beer Stop as the wayward Keenies made their way to it, for a very quick Beer, Port with some Skips, Twiglets & Cheddars.

When it came to the Down-Downs the Hare & her two little Helpers of Lemming & Mother were rewarded for a good Trail which covered some territory in their own County that Herts had never run before! 

There were too many water crossing dodgers to all have a Down-Down, but Sludge was out as the RA picked up a golf ball in the river Gade that Mr X claimed was a stray shot of Sludge’s from the Crazy Golf.  The ball ended up in the Down-Down Beer Sludge was handed.

The RA did recount a couple of older misdemeanors that have gone unpunished since they occurred; Pebbledash was out for her ‘sand-angel’ [Like a snow angel but on sand! – Ed] on the beach at the Hert’s Christmas Weekend, the RA said that it was unusual to see her on her back with her legs wide open!

Tent Packer & TBT OBE were out for water dodging, plus the ‘borrowing’ of the abandoned trolley, their cat-burgling skills was also mentioned.  TBT OBE was again out, this time for the picking up of an old bike out of a Skip, that he took back from the Christmas Weekend for Foxy, who joined him for calling him Teebs in an email to the RA about this!

There was no Hashit this week, but if there was it would have gone to Kylie as when he had his Down-Down [Sob stories of going back to work! – Ed] he tried to ‘Do a Skip’ & throw his beer over his head, except it all went in to his hood, which My Lil’ saw & was quick enough to pull up over Kylie’s head to baptize him in Ale!  The Pack were in hysterics over this one!