Date = 23rd October 2016
Run Number = 1702
Venue = The Moon Under Water
Beer = Adnams Sloe Porter; Shepherd Neame Green Hop Ale; Ruddles County; Green King IPA, Abbott
Hares = Pepé le Pew
Runners = 33
Virgins = 0
Visitors = 0
Newies = 0
Apres = 1
Hounds = 0
Total = 34
Membership = Celebrating 2-1-2 Maureen’s 80th!
Well, what a day & a decent turn out to celebrate 2-1-2 Maureen's 80th Birthday. The weather was fine, if a little chilly when out of the sunshine. Those who had glanced at social media that morning would have seen on the Herts Farcebook page that the Hare had completed setting the Trail that morning & had posted a selfie on the Herts Farcebook page of him enjoying a well-deserved' Pint at 09:30 Hrs.
Mr X & My Lil' arrived to find Stephen already in the Bar, but unlike these two he opted not to go for a Pint! The rest of the Pack were soon arriving & what a god turn out it was.
Ewok had carried out her GM duties behind the scenes with the Whetherspoons' Pub, they had arranged for a photographer to come along for an article in their next in-house magazine. This led to an email request from the GM for Hashers to wear decent Hash Shirts to be displayed for the photo, a side-effect of this was the rare sight of the Haberdasher having T-Shirts for sale, in itself a thing worthy of a snapshot for prosperity! TBT OBE then admitted that he hadn’t taken any money for the one that Stephen bought that morning!
Gill, the photographer arranged the Pack outside of the Pub in a shot that would include the Pub signage in the background. There were the usual funny remarks as the scene was arranged, after an initial problem which could have been an issue with the glare of the sun reflecting from more than one bald head on show.
A change of lens & a bit of rearranging of the Pack 2-1-2 Maureen was brought to the front, Henry the Dog & Lofty were brought in at the side then it was cheesy grins all around as a couple of photos were taken, Gill seemed pretty pleased with the results, the rest will have to wait until the winter edition of the 'Spoons magazine comes out. [Hopefully it doesn't end up like the current edition that was spotted in the Bar, this was folded over & wedged under one table's short leg to stop it wobbling? - Ed]
The GM conducted her welcoming speech, getting the Run Number correct & then there were a few comments on 2-1-2 Maureen's milestone achievements, before handing over to the Hare, Pepé le Pew was brief with his spiel, the interesting bits were: It was short, there were short cuts, there were no marked False Trails, just CHKs, & finally but most importantly there was a Port Held CHK!
Then without further ado the Pack were sent away, Southward down Chase Side Road, the Trail came to a CHK at a point where the path to the cricketers departs at a 20 degree angle from the main road & on to Chase Side Place
While Zing-a-long-a-max & Alfa Male choose to stick with the main drag, no doubt being lured by the thought that the Trail could go over the green open space of Chase Green Gardens on the west side of the Chase Side Road, no Trail was that way. Meanwhile the others peeled off & ran down by the front of the Cricketers, an old McMullens Pub hidden from the main street so it has two signs, one on the main road & the other behind where it they separated by a row of shops. The Hare wasn’t being cruel to the Hash, as they now passed by the Crown & Horses for this small area is nearly a wash with Pubs.
The Trail moved on alongside the New River, in an area of Olde Worlde Enfield that has lots of little Mews & alleyways linking the terraces & other quaint homes. The Trail would come up to the next CHK & from here the Hare was going to show off his local Knowledge, having been brought up around these parts.
Lemming & Mother were impressed at this quaint, village like part of Enfield & it wasn't long before Lemming asked Mr X (The font of all knowledge on the Hash) what the waterway was. Mr X didn't disappoint as he explained that this was the 'New River' which was constructed to convey fresh drinking water to London’s reservoirs by the New River Company, saving people from succumbing to Cholera & other fatal waterborne diseases.
Under a Royal Charter of James I (VI of Scotland) it opened in 1613, Sir Hugh Myddleton was the main architect of its construction. Rising from Chadwell Springs in Ware, it runs for 20 miles to Stoke Newington, of the 8 water suppliers to London, it had the least impurities of 0.8!
From the next CHK the Keenies were caught out as they searched the path in to Little Park Gardens & a few went in to the housed area but found no Trail, they were soon back out. Mr X pointed out to returnees of the likes of Lemming, Kylie, Mark E Mark & Ketchup that they were now avoiding Gentleman's Row, where the likes of them & the Hash would probably not be welcome there, but all the residents were saved from the hoi polloi as the Trail took to an alleyway to run on to the T-junction of footpaths where Pennyfathers begins a 90° departure from Holly Walk.
Arrows were picked up on Penny Fathers passing behind the homes on the west & a sports park to the east, the Pack would come out from the area behind the Crown & Horses. The Trail was now found over the footbridge on the New River, a nice tort along the path beside the bank of the New River to a cut-through away from the water way & out on to Parsonage Lane.
An alleyway straight across the road looked the most promising but seemed to be overlooked by Mr X & couple of others before the Trail was found by Zing-a-along-a-max, Alfa Male, Tent Packer up the first passageway. "On!" was called & the Hash continued on a few degrees westward of due north, crossing Manor & then Halifax Roads via two more passageways before coming out on to Gordon Road.
From the CHK there the Trail was picked up to the west before it swung around to the north again as it led the way up by the small green park & enclosed play area on Chase Side Crescent to pass by the Wonder. A McMullens’ Pub Mr X knew & along with the Star a regular run venue for Enfield Hash to run from. Zing-a-long-a-max almost went wrong here but the calling from Sludge, Stand-in Shit, Fireball & the others who had passed by the Pub.
The Trail would cross Lancaster Road & begin a due north run, from the end of Woodland Road another series alleyways would cut through the rows of terraced homes on the side streets of Glenville, Brodie & finally Cedar Park Roads before coming out to Phipps Hatch Lane.
Lemming & Mother were suitably impressed when they asked Mr X about the Transport links in Enfield, he reeled a few off, which does make it Metro-land. Some are on the Hertford Loop line in to Kings Cross & Moorgate, while others in Enfield head in to Tottenham Hale & Liverpool Street.
Directly across the road lies Hilly Field Park, Where's Wally? Also had believed to have local knowledge of this area & said that he knew the place well said that they used to have musicians playing at the Bandstand a little further into the Park. Where's Wally? Disappeared from sight not long after this & wasn't to be seen for quite some time, luckily he was supposed to know the area! Many like No Eye Deer were surprised to find that the countryside encroaches in to Enfield, the locals certainly were out & about enjoying these rural parts.
From the CHK on the southern edge of the Park Sludge, Tent Packer & Stephen began heading over toward the Bandstand to the north, the Hare arrived to call them all back as Alfa Male, Zing-a-long-a-max & My Lil’ headed off away on the nor-nor-westerly path that cuts diagonally across the grassy space, heading slightly downhill to the junction where another hard-capped path crosses it at right-angles, here by two park benches the Held CHK with an extra letter in was found, the extra letter brought joy to the faces of Mr X, My Lil' & others who weren't driving, for the 'P' stood for Port!
Pepé le Pew got out the Port & shot glasses for it to be poured & distributed to the Hash. Mr X soon moved positions to get nearer to the bottle, he was immediately bypassed by a laughing Pepé, before he went back to deliver a tot of Port to the RA. The gathering Pack came to the attention of a few of the Civilians out & about walking, one guy admitted that he may be too late for a drink, Pepé le Pew said “This lot had to run to earn it!”
It was here that Henry the dog could be let of the lead by Lofty & he mooched around. The Pack waited as long as they could for the SCBs to catch up, with the prospect of seizing up becoming a real prospect. Pepé gave Alfa Male the taxing job of collecting all of the empty used shot glasses for washing & to be used again, nothing more was thought of this until Fireball was spotted throwing hers in to the green bin beside her.
The Hare told the RA that this Trail was set to a Windmill standard of 4.1 miles, just without the measured string on a OS map, which he did in honour of Windmill who used to Hash with Enfield as well as Herts.
Pepé le Pew immediately requested the discarded glass was retrieved, but as Fireball lifted the green lid to w one hand in the bin, the RA shouted out that it was a dog-waste bin! Then the words Pepé le Pew didn't want to hear were uttered by Fireball "Oh, there are loads in here already!" As they used shot glasses nestled amongst the tied plastic bags of poop! Alfa Male had been found out!
Time was passing & 2-1-2 Maureen was still not in sight, she was back on Trail & had been walking along with Lobby Lobster, Ewok, Psycho, Party Animal, Paxo & other Harriettes who chaperoned her at various times on the Trail. The Hare raised a toast “To Maureen!” & after this he allowed the Keenies to move on again, which was most advantageous in getting away from the odor of the dog-waste bin. Alfa Male had already once been down to the wooded hollow to the northwest & had started on his way back when the rest started heading down toward him.
The Trail ran down to the Turkey Brook, there Alfa Male & Zing-a-long-a-max searched beside the flowing brook as it runs westward, Mr X followed on to but all to no avail, others searched the woodland over the small bridge spanning the brook, eventually someone stumbled upon the Trail that was slightly hidden by the fallen russet coloured autumnal leaves to head up the most obvious footpath along the eastern side of the wood & the fenced-off horse paddocks to the east.
This old path turned to tarmac as it climbed up Clay Hill to emerge in to the edge of the Clay Hill Road, there a CHK was found. By the rime the RA had made it up there, after going wrong earlier, he bumped into Sludge & Tent Packer, who were coming back from the eastern option on the road, Mr X enquired "Have you gents found anything down there?" Knowing full well there was no Trail in that direction.
The main body of the Hash could be seen heading westward along the roadside, passing the sad sight of the boarded up & now being demolished Fallow Buck Pub, [This is why you should register your local Pub as a ‘Community Assest’ - Ed]
At the crossroads it was chalked SC for a short cut. It was downhill along the edge of the Kingswood area of the park for the SCBs, while the Keenies continued on westward along Strayfields lane to come down the London Loop behind the Cricket Club to meet the Short Cut by Queenswood Farm
Stand-in Shit was confused when the Dust appeared at the meeting of the two Trails, not realizing everyone were all now on the same route down to the footbridge over the Turkey Brook for the second time on the Trail. It was here that Where's Wally? Suddenly appeared, as if from out of nowhere - like the Shopkeeper in Mr Benn. He knew where the Trail would go, having run around most of the Lavender Hill Cemetery. He confessed to the RA that he went awry after reminiscing about Cooks Hole, which had a reputation as a place for a bit of canoodling! Or an early dogging spot!
The Pack continued southward on the main path between the headstones & memorials to come out of the cemetery by the chapel & the main entrance, outside of this on Cedar Road a CHK was found & to the surprise of those around him, Where's Wally? went off back up to the northeast, perhaps it was the lure of Cooks Hole Road that coaxed him that way?
Anyhow, Sludge, Mr X & My Lil' ran down Lavender Gardens toward the junction where Gordon Hill Station sits, Sludge missed the Hash arrows directing the way over to run down Gordon Hill Road on a southeastern direction. The On Inn was found just before the traffic light junction near the Six Bells on Chase Side Road, so it was just a case of turning southward & run a short way to the Pub.
On the way back the RA spotted a skeleton fancy dress outfit in a charity shop window, his were not the only eyes to gaze upon this item, Skip also noticed this on display & took the opportunity to stop off & purchase it for the next Herts Hash, as it is the Mexican Day of the Dead Trail.
As is the norm with the Hash, there were those who couldn't wait to eat, ordering before the Circle was called! The proceedings were slightly held up when the barrel of chosen Ale ran out, but at least the friendly & helpful staff brought this over to the outside table off the Circle. Flanders didn't want a fuss made of her reaching a numbered Run & inform the RA of this at the Bar, she didn't want to take the attention away from 2-1-2 Maureen's Day.
Some had to leave their food, while Where's Wally? had gone, so that was one Down-Down that had to be reallocated, luckily there were still plenty of candidates!
The Hare did a great job of the Trail, taking some on uncharted areas for them. Mr X was handed a pint by Pepé le Pew as he elaborated too much on one story, the RA downed it with no fuss.
Other Down-Downs awarded were: Mark E Mark for setting off Pepé le Pew's car alarm, while trying stowing away a change of clothes for after the Run, he'll be back out in the Circle after his next Run when he picks up the clothes he left behind! Paxo was out for apparently doing 37 in a 30 mile an hour zone, of course this raised a few comments [Didn’t think that Fred Flintstone’s Car went that fast? – Ed] Whatever She Says was out for his wanting an alcohol free Hash, but wasn't shy in coming forward as hew was first in line for a shot of Port at the Port Stop!
2-1-2 Maureen was awarded an embroidered jacket, then a glass of Champagne for her Down-Down, in honour of her 80th Birthday. Flanders was out for not wanting to upstage 2-1-2 Maureen! Alfa Male was awarded the Hashit & two Down-Downs, one being in a shot glass for at the winter warming ‘Port Stop’ regroup, he collected & then threw the empty shot glasses into a Dog-waste Bin so the Hare could no longer recycle them Fireball was out with him for reaching in to the dog-waste bin!