Date = 27th December 2016
Run Number = 1711
Venue = The Woodman
Beer = XT 4, XT25; & more…
Hares = My Lil’
Runners = 24
Virgins = 0
Visitors = 0
Newies = 0
Apres = 0
Hounds = 0
Total = 27
Membership = Going Wild over Wild Hill!
A Hash on a Tuesday is an unusual occurrence, but that's the way bank holidays fell this year, with Christmas on a Sunday & Boxing Day on a Monday so we had 'Substitute Holiday Tuesday!
The turnout was far more than expected, with it being festive holiday season, perhaps it was the fact it was a mild bright sunny day or was it chance to burn off some of the excess Christmas Pub? Anyhow, by the time the Pack had assembled in the Car Park the early morning frost was rapidly vanishing.
Paxo stood in for the absent GM, then the Virgins were introduced as Wanktler's wife, daughter & boyfriend (The daughter's Boyfriend & not Wanktler's) Seems that on his first visit to run with Enfield & after some issue with his festive antler head-gear for the Fancy Dress Run, Stephen was named so.
The Hare was called forward to the usual chorus of booing, he had already marked the start of the Trail with an arrow toward the kissing gate into the field to the east of the Pub, but with the virgin Hashers being present it was deemed wise that he showed them the Herts Trail Markings. The RA was not alone at being overjoyed to see & point out that the Hare drew a CHK in the middle of the car park, for most know that when he is a mere hound he hates to start a Trail with a CHK point!
So, after a shot of Pepé le Pew's latest Port & Rum concoction, the Pack set off up into the crop fields that sits higher than the car park. The going was just a walk to start with, since the ground was still a little hard but of more concern was the holes & churned up ankle turning lumps created by Horses hooves. The whole area is awash with horses & there are even stables at the rear of the Pub.
The trail headed southeastward, out of the crop field & on the a set aside edge of another large farm field, the pheasant feeders gave away that the teasels & clumps of old maize stems this area is left for shelter & feeding of these daft game birds. The Pack made their way up to the tree line of Kentish Lane, once through the thicket & safely over the road an arrow pointed the way along the footpath to the north, in the direction of Essendon.
The Trail made its way up to the junction at the bend in the road, Tent Packer & Sludge seemed keen to know if the Trail crossed over at the triangle & passed by the village hall to head the few hundred yards back down the hill to the Woodman? The Hare's response didn't cheer them up as he said it didn't!
A CHK was found just around the bend as the road changes from Kentish Lane to Cum Cum Hill Lane! [Yes Pebbledash it really is called that! - Ed] From here Mr X's local knowledge was to prove fallible as he crossed over the road to run down by the Ornate Gates to the main Entrance to Camfield Place, former home to Barbara Cartland the prolific writer of ‘Bodice Ripping’ Victorian Romance, She produced a total of 723 novels which were translated into 38 languages. [Pah! The current Herts scribe has produced over a 1,000 Reports! – Ed] She continues to be referenced in the Guinness World Records for the most novels published in a single year in 1976. She also wrote under her married name of Barbara McCorquodale & briefly under the pseudonym of Marcus Belfry. She reportedly sold more than 750 million copies, other sources estimate her book sales at more than two billion copies.
Beyond the wrought Iron it was then on to the CHK by the entrance to Camfield Farm. This well run track of Hashes past led on by the solitary estate home & around on to the Track that heads northward to Duncan's wood, there was a smell of a farmyard bonfire wafting through the air as Mr X led quite a few of the Keenies around the slight bend in the stony track to a T!
On the return around the back of the secluded red brick hen house a couple of different Cocks appeared as Where's Wally & the RA stopped to 'scare the Squirrels'! This necessary break would put them further behind the likes of Dillon, Milf, Sparky, No Eye Deer & Judy who had all also gone on the Falsie!
Back out to cross directly over Cum Cum Hill Lane [Look it up on a map for yourselves if you don’t believe me! – Ed] to see the rest of the Pack, with 2-1-2 Maureen, Charlotte, Sloppy Seconds & the Hare all out ahead of them down the long paved drive way of Hornbeam lane, with the namesakes trees forming the avenue to Warrenwood Stables & Stud. Sparky was warned to be sensible with his horn [Whoa there Pebbledash! – Ed] but later on this would prove pointless as he managed to agitate a horse that a woman was walking out. One day Sparky may find himself in A & E having his horn removed from his rectum [Steady Pebbledash! – Ed] if he is not careful & doesn’t use a bit of common sense!
After the Trail had passed by the large brick built stables for the Stud, & Warrenwood House, an area that has dramatically been modernised since the days of Mr X's sister's horse riding there, leaving the large house & its fountain behind the track became an old uncapped by-way leading along the southern edge of Nine Acre Wood, this was a long trot & there was a lack of Dust as the Hare declared that it had been rubbed off from where he had placed it on the trees lining the way, he wondered if it could have been those who could be heard shooting in the distance? More than likely it was to do with the Stud.
Tent Packer slowed up several times to look back up the long section to see how Charlotte was getting on, Max Factor & Milf both slowed up to have a chat before the Trail come out on to Cucumber Hall Lane. Once on the tarmac lane the trail continued its southeastern direction to the Junction with Tyler's Causeway road.
To the east a footpath sign could be seen, yet No Eye Deer & Wanktler's daughter & boyfriend had gone wrong on Woodfield road to the west. No Eye Deer laughed when she noticed the sign for Cucumber Hall Lane, shame missed the other Lane earlier!
Ketchup, Prince Garmin, Alfa Male & our Newbies were already off down the Coldharbour farm track which started by a solitary set back house, this led southward & they disappeared from sight as they followed the Dust down around the eastward bend, they would soon be back around the hedgerow corner after finding a Bar CHK.
The middle order of the Hash were now fairly well bunched back together. Ketchup moaned about how far the Bar CHK was, but Mr X said that he had the same amount of sympathy felt as those who were happy to see him do a similar thing near the start of the Trail, which was absolutely none!
Over to the southwest the distinctive tall skeletal aerial of the Brookmans Park transmitter could be seen dominating the skyline, Mr X said to Sludge earlier that he thought if the Trail went clockwise then the Long trail split would head out to this & then back to the shorter option
The Trail was now marked to head westward along the farm track on the longest single stretch of the Run without a CHK. The track led on by Barbers Lodge Farm & then on through Woodfield farm, having passed between the out buildings there was the distinct smell of a barbeque being started, this was soon seen near to the plethora of ‘Four by fours’ parked up for the local shoot.
The farm’s drive now rose from the level & came out on to Kentish Lane again, an arrow showed the way straight over on to Grubs Lane as it heads due west. A short way along the lane to the entrance to Kentish Lane Farm were the Long Short Split was found, which some Hashes like Essex H3 are known as a ‘Turkey Eagle split’! Both ending up at the same place, but either option of a different length!
Milf, Judy, Where's Wally? All chose to do the long section, which led off southwestward from beside the drive-side paddock, over at the end of the field the large distinctive shape of a water tower could be seen & near to this as the footpath leaves the farmland.
The Trail would lead on by the security fencing which surrounds the Brookmans Park transmitter & large satellite dishes, the footpath leads out to the Great North Road, but now days there is a set-aside strip that allows the Trail to avoid running on the old A1 & the Cock of the North Pub, [Steady there Pebbledash! – Ed] It’s named after Alexander Gordon, 4th Duke of Gordon, Keeper of the Great Seal of Scotland from 1794 to 1806 & from 1807 to 1827. In addition, he was Lord Lieutenant of Aberdeenshire until 1808. He received the Order of the Thistle from King George III on 11 January 1775. The Dictionary of National Biography described him thus: "At the time of his marriage the Duke was reputed one of the handsomest men of his day." Hence his nickname of Cock of the North.
He raised the 92nd (Gordon Highlanders) Regiment of Foot in 1794 for the French Revolutionary Wars, notably Waterloo, though he was not present at the battle. Just for Kylie: It was also his name given to The London and North Eastern Railway Class P2, 2-8-2 steam locomotives designed by Sir Nigel Gresley for working heavy express trains over the harsh Edinburgh to Aberdeen Line.
Meanwhile the SCBs took to the shorter of the two choices marked by the Hare at the Turkey Eagle split, this would stick with Grubbs Lane, passing by the old School House which is now a private residence & here the old seemingly abandoned old classic cars rotting behind the hedge caught Dillon's attention.
The footpath stopped as the SCBs made their way up the fairly quiet rustic lane to a point where the Long Trail emerged from its diagonal course across the crop field & through the hedgerow, an arrow pointed the way up toward the opposite footpath sign a few yards to the north.
The final long stretch of the Trail lay ahead as the footpath left Grubbs Lane to head north-easterly over the farm land, taking a slight turn in its course near to a clump of woodland, signposted as ‘Private’ before descending into the vale & coming Inn through the horse paddocks to the south of the Pub.
The Pack settled in to the Bar, which would become increasingly busy as the early afternoon wore on. When the RA went out to change he found Zing-a-long-a-max had made it around as well after a late start.
Back in the Bar & there was that rarity of running out of Hash Trashes happened as the Pack enjoyed one of the Splendid Ales on offer. Milf, Kylie & Dillon didn't hang around too long as they had to get back to EHMR. Or perhaps they were coming down with a dose of the TBT OBE's, who was supposed to come along this day but ended up sitting it out on the pan with a dodgy tummy.
It came around to the Circle out front of the Pub, this was the cue for locals to dive in on the empty seats, even with bags & coats remaining on them!
The Hare was rewarded with his Down-Down for setting a good Trail, although it was slightly long in places. This week saw the three Virgins receive their hits for completing their first Herts Trail.
Zing-a-long-a-max was out for his return, plus contributing to Paxo's Birthday Pressie Fund. Charlotte was out for a naming, after only two Herts Hashes & having done nothing wrong as yet to warrant one, but it seems that there was a desire to have a Tent based name, the usual round the Circle brought various options but in the end it turns out that Ground Sheet was the most popular!
The Hashit went to Where's Wally? As he was making up from his previous week's absence by wearing a Santa outfit, muscling in on Sludge's territory!
Back I the Pub & there was one old boy who had bagged a spot at a table with coats & bags, the Pack didn’t mind him being there, not even when he tried the trick an old tramp in London tried on Ketchup’s mate the other weekend, when Ketchup & his mate stopped for a takeaway while on the go in London, eating it outside from off the flat top of a Mutliplexing unit bit of street furniture which go the attention of a dirty old tramp who came across, leant over & proceeded to cough all over the open take away, which resulted in Ketchup’s mate giving his food to the tramp!