Date =                              3rd March 2018

Run Number =             1784    

Venue =                        The First Post; Old Familiar; The Famous Cock; The Cross Hands Shot Stop; The Good Companions;

                                        The Kings Head; The Hole in the Wall & The World’s End

Location =                    Welwyn Garden City & Letchworth Garden City

Beer =                             Loads

Hares =                          Mr X & My Lil’

Starters =                      15

Joiners =                        2

Fishers =                      10

Membership =             Surviving the Worlds End – Again for some!!


The Trail would start from outside of the Howard Centre, there was supposed to be a R*nning Trail but the weather over the previous few days curtailed the hopes of some FUK Full Mooners to get back to having more R*nning Trails to balance out these & the Pub Crawl Trails!  The Pub Crawl Gods had smiled upon the likes of Tops, Windsock & Panda, as the overnight snow had settled on top of the older compacted snow & ice beneath.

Milf called off her attempts to turn out, not because the roads were blocked, on the contrary they were really clear, it was the fact that the R*nning Trail had been cancelled that put her off! 

So, there were only a handful to arrive at Welwyn Garden City station, mainly due to the Rail Replacement Bus Service putting more off, but fair do’s to Weeny Schnitzel, Premature Ejection, Action Man, Stiff Meat, Max Factor & Alfa Male, who were joined by the Hares of Mr X & My Lil’, both with another local of TC who was turning out for the first time in ages.

Evidential Pictures were taken outside of the Howard Centre before the few set off to catch cabs out to Pub Stop 1, though Smartarse, Weeny Schnitzel & Premature Ejection elected to walk the mile & a half over to the First Pub - The Peartree (The First Post), here Panda, Windsock & Tops were already ensconced within, since they were staying there overnight, a fact that three of the local Hashers on this Trail were surprised about & something that they wouldn’t have considered a few years back!

Digger & Fergie pulled up at the first Pub, having originally parked in Welwyn Garden City Town Centre & now wondered why they hadn’t been directed to start from Pub 1?  It wasn’t long until Smartarse, Weeny & Premature Ejection arrived to complete those who were going to undertake the attempt to do all of the Pubs on the ‘Newtown Haven Pub Crawl’.  Mr X marked a Full Moon CHK with a number One inside it, outside the doors to the Last Post!

The first reference to the World’s End Film plot was when Action Man ordered, as he did last time, ordered a pint of water to go with his Ale – this was in respect to Nick Frost’s character being tee-total at this point in the story!  Meanwhile Panda admitted that he only saw the film the night before, which left him with a hunger for a ‘Marmalade Sandwich’!

Stiff Meat had previously asked one of the Hares if he could undertake this crawl by having half pints, but this didn’t start as planned as he chose a Pint of Seafarers!  Tops handed out Trashes before she & Mr X got around to welcoming everyone to the relative Hash R*n Numbers for Herts & the FUK Full Moon H3

Windsock questioned the Itinerary originally sent out by Mr X, which did have two stops mixed up near the end of the Trail in Letchworth, Mr X said it didn’t matter that much as one stop had completely gone, flatten to be an old peoples unit!

The Questioning of Mr X continued when he was asked whether this area was the Scottish or Irish part of Welwyn Garden City?  People moving here for work in the 1920-40’s tended to settle in groups from the regions they came from, Mr X pointed out the Catholic Club & Our Lady’s’ Church over the road to prove it was within the Irish Area – not that you’d know that now as things have changed a lot since the early days of the town’s development.

With 50 minutes allocated for Pub 1, there was time for some extra Ale before the Cabs arrived to ferry the Hash back to the Town Centre, everyone took a taxi on to Stop 2 The Doctor’s Tonic (The Old Familiar) which already had a CHK with a number two in it outside of one entrance. 

On the way in to stop number two there were comments about Mr X’s picture on the previous Trail when he laid down to make out he was drinking the ‘Dog’s Ale’ but with the snow & ice he wasn’t getting down for any pooch water pics this time around! 

The Hash settled in to the Doctors Tonic, the pace was still fairly leisurely in the building that was once the local Cottage Hospital, from which it derived its name of the Doctor’s Tonic.  More talk of the film took place, as the joke of the interior of the ‘Old Familiar’ is actually the first Pub interior again but with only difference being “2 for 1 offers” on the chalkboards – this fits in with the ‘refurbishment’ as being “Starbucked” as they all look the same, like cloned bars!

Supping up & the Pack set off on the walk of 273 Yards (250m) walk to Stop 3 - The Two Willows (The Famous Cock) crossing over Howardsgate where the falling over the hedge scene was filmed, plus passing the unique 1960’s Advertising units, this was marked by My Lil’ whose last Trail in Welwyn Garden City had a snow fall.  [Maybe a ban on him setting Trail’s in his home Garden City between the Autumnal & Vernal Equinoxes? – Ed]

While the pack got their drinks in here, Mr X shot off over to Welwyn Garden City Railway station to get Tickets to the Letchworth leg of the Trail for TC, Windsock, Tops, Panda, Weeny & Premature Ejection, which only took a few minutes, he just had time to put in stop four’s CHK around the corner form the Famous Cock, then he was back in the fold that had been marked stop three inside the CHK outside.

Now inside in the warm, Mr X pointed out, to those who weren’t on the Previous Crawl, the large print of the original concept of Ebenezer Howard’s Garden City, ironically Junior’s Home, as well Mr X’s nearby abode are situated in the sector near the ‘Home for Inebriates’ as well being rather close to the planned ‘Mental Asylum’ are located on the map.

The Pack moved around to the rear side room, to satisfy Action Man’s wish to see the ‘Famous Cock’ Mirror that still remains after the filming was complete in the Cork as the Two Willows was known back in the day.  Around in the back the Pack were joined by Junior – another who hasn’t been seen for quite a while on the Hash.  Perhaps it was the early comments on where he resides that conjured up his appearance?

Time to have a Circle outside of the Pub, for in the Film -  Gary was barred for life from here & actually drinks the three half-full pints [Stacked & left up by Junior no doubt? – Ed] left on the table outside the Pub as the Golden Mile Pub Crawl continues.  

Smartarse awarded his Hits, taking his time as the minute hand of the Hares watches edged further toward the itinerary’s time to be at the next stop!  Mr X was handed his Down-Down for volunteering to set the Trail again, while his co-Hare of My Lil’ had his half for another Trail set in Welwyn Garden City Town Centre that was plagued with snow fall.

This Stop was the departure point for Fergus, Digger, Smartarse & Junior, as the Pack were handed shot glasses with Fergie getting a green, a white & an orange one for a reverse of the Cote d'ivoire Flag, Weeny decided that these would make good Alien Eyes displaying them protruding from his eye sockets!

A short walk of all of the 168 Yards (154m) to Stop 4 - The Parkway Bar (The Cross Hands) sadly this is now shut, allegedly to become a Turkish Restaurant?  [So, Kebabs & Efes on the next Running of this Crawl? - Ed]  So, to compensate for the lack of a Bar to go in to the Hares returned to the Film’s Plot.  In the Film this is where, after the first fight scene with the Aliens, Andy Knightly (Nick Frost) falls off of the wagon & necks all of the shots Gary has bought!  So it was fitting that this would be a shot stop of Sloe Gin outside the front.

The Trail left the Town Centre’s Parkway, one of the main areas for film shooting to head through an alleyway & down a ramp used for more film scenes before entering the Howard Centre to head down in to the basement to catch the Rail Replacement Bus Service.  Meanwhile Windsock, Tops & Panda had elected to get a cab over to Letchworth.

To entertain the troops on the bus journey through a couple of the villages in white blanket covered rural Hertfordshire countryside there would be an alien cocktail, which made the time stopping at two rural stations before finishing at Stevenage far more pleasurable.  Though, Mr X firstly had to get those of the Hash onboard to all move from the seats they had just randomly sat on, for just like naughty school kids on a school trip the back seats of the ‘luxury coach’ were the best place to be as Mr X got out his Cocktail Fire-Extinguisher.

This year’s Cocktail was far superior, as Mr X admitted, this time it was Blue Curaçao, Archer’s Peach Schnapps & for a bit of fizz Blue WKD topped it off.  This was complimented with packets of Space Raiders, a choice of Pickled Onion or Beef, the beef flavor is actually rather good!  A Couple of cups of the cocktail made the journey far more enjoyable.

Arriving at Stevenage Railway Station those alighting from the Bus found a Train waiting on the platform to whisk them the short distance of the two stops to Letchworth, the Cocktail was finished off on this Train ride while two blue inflatable Aliens were inflated by Mr X & Action Man, an effort that needed more blue cocktail sustenance.  Even with the replacement Bus, the pack were now ahead of schedule as they made their way to the Letchworth Garden City Brewery

Mr X marked the 212 Yards (194m) to Trail from the Station through to the Wynd to the Stop 5 at the Brewery, with the Inflatable Aliens in tow things were getting feeling like the last time around the Golden Mile Pub Crawl.  In the Brewery the Pack were joined by Mother & Lemming, as well as catching up with Windsock, Panda & Tops who were already there after their cab ride.

On their meeting, Lemming said that he could have laid odd on Mr X wearing shorts (as he was) even when there was snow on the ground outside!  [William Hill offer short odds on Mr X’s pants! – Ed]

Although not in the Film, as it hadn’t been founded when the Film was shot, The Letchworth Garden City Brewery was included as it was on the crawl the last time to represent the Good Companions, which was a shop in the film but now superseded on this year’s crawl by the recently opened Crafty’s Bottle Shop which is located a few shops up on the parade from where the filming too place.

It was also explained that the Hash could enjoy the Beers in the Brewery as the Trail need to make up a pint after the last Pub in Welwyn Garden was now closed.  Soon it was time to move on all of 69 Yards (64m) to Stop 6 - Crafty's Bottle Shop (The Good Companions) situated in a former Jeweler’s Shop.

Weeny & Premature Ejection, as well as Panda, Windsock & Tops appreciated this small bar as it has a fairly decent selection of Belgian & craft beers as well as Real Ale.  Mr X had also twigged that Stiff Meat still hadn’t had a half pint!  [He wouldn’t for the rest of the Trail!]  Premature Ejection & Stiff Meat were among those who wondered about the wobbly wooden flooring, Mr X said it was just like a big Jenga game that a bad looser had thrown on the floor!  Looking at Max Factor as he said this as she is probably still the Herts Hash reigning Jenga Queen

            Marked by My Lil’ the going was hardly tough & the Pack now had 21 Yards (19m) to walk over to Stop 7 - The Three Magnets (The Trusty Servant) this ‘Spoons Pub was the place to have the first St David’s Day Ale, which occurred two days earlier, & it was rather nice toboot.  There was a chance for the First food options for some, of course as their food went by a round of ‘Hash Food’ went up as Max & Alfa’s grub crossed the Bar!

The Trail moved up 113 Yards (104m) to Stop 8 - The Platform (Two Headed Dog) this was marked by Mr X, who also managed to get in the next four stops marked before meeting the rest back in the Platform.  Here in this busy sports the locals were interested in why the Hash had two inflatable Aliens, which by this time were standing on their own two feet, that’s what they are capable of when they are fully inflated!  It was here that the Aliens got above their station, well one did quite obviously as it was placed up on a low cupboard top to lord over he puny humans below!

A Circle outside was followed by a walk of 324 Yards (297m) to Stop 9 The Broadway Cinema Bar (The Mermaid) where the Hash gathered in the Art-Deco Foyer to enjoyed one of the quicker stops, for they had bottled beers & it seems that Becks was the best, it also allowed the Hash to keep to the Schedule, as well as those who hadn’t eaten yet could nip out & grab some chips form one of the three chippies in Letchworth! 

As well as Panda’s ‘Marmalade Sandwich’ scene taking place in the Mermaid, the interior was filmed in a set, the Broadway Cinema is a Heritage Building where the Premier of the World’s End Film was shown.  So, 'in tribute' some like My Lil' & Lemming [Lightweights! - Ed] decided that they would drink Cokes, Action Man didn't go for the Coke but he did go for the obligatory cinema treat of a bucket of Pop-corn.

            Then Stiff Meat, who had stuck with his pints all the way so far got a bit excited & somehow knocked over a red wine, this was enough to upset any Panda [Think it was Windsock's or Tops? - Ed] it was time to sup up & move on while the staff came out to clean up the red puddle by one of the free-standing aliens. The shortest leg of the crawl took place now, so it was time to move the 'shell-shocked Panda & the clumsy Mr Meat out the mere 31 Yards (29m) to Stop 10 Cocktail at the Former Black Squirrel (The Beehive) nothing remains of this building, or the secluded patio for the cocktails used on the last crawl, however Windsock had purchased more Blue Curaçao & Archers so this stop could take place, fortunately it wasn’t too long out in the cold for the Pack.

Back by the Cinema, the Trail was remarked by Mr X to take a diagonal stagger of 101 Yards (93m) through the car park Stop 11 The Arena Tavern (The Kings Head) this Pub had been decorated since the last World’s End Pub Crawl & the film posters had been replaced, but once the staff knew what the pack were up to they got out all of the memorabilia!

Once again full sets of Collectors World’s End Beer mats were given out to those who didn’t get the last time.  The whole scene was filmed in this Bar when the last three Heroes in the film escape out of the Bar’s fire exit.  This was the point at which Mr X left his again empty Cocktail Fire Extinguisher, at least he hung on to his bag of flour to mark the Trail down the Broadway  to the Penultimate Pub.  

On the way down the Broadway the Trail skipped the Broadway Hotel, for it was only an upstairs bedroom used in an escape scene [Who knows, one day the Trains will run on time & there will be time to add this to the list? – Ed]  A stagger of 276 Yards (253m) to Stop 12 La Concha (The Hole in the Wall) Panda liked this small tapas Bar situated on the side of the Letchworth Garden City Station.

Again with Blue Aliens on hand the Pack got lot attention from the locals as Panda seemed settled in to this place when he discovered a rather nice Red to chat up – there must be a name for someone who loves wine bottles? [Oenophilia – A Love of Wine! – Ed]  This was the last place My Lil’ would be seen, also disappearing at this point were Max factor & Alfa Male.

This Year Mr X kept an eye on TC & made sure that when the time came, he was piled in to a cab to get up to Stop 13 The Wilbury (The World’s End) (1 mile from station taxi rank) for TC floundered at the Hole in the Wall & was not seen again on the last crawl.  This time his minder made sure he would arrive at the Worlds End!

The Wilbury  - The World’s End, Lemming hadn’t realized that this place has been done up since the last World’s End Pub Crawl, yes the decor was an improvement!  Mother asked if they were still serving pizzas, but the manager said that they had run out of dough in a Pub that used to make its money on Carveries, but since the revamp (?) it now has a pizzeria there.

While Mother wasn’t getting fed, Mr X was offering three teenagers in the far end, by the window in the rounded end of the Bar that if they moved he would buy then a drink, the sight of Mr X lurching about with a blue inflatable Alien was enough to scare make the move on their own accord, they refused the offer of a free drink.

Now the survivors could get their picture taken in the same place as the previous Crawl’s Survivors had theirs taken, for some it was their second time of succeeding in doing the Golden Mile, the Bar Maid took the photos & took a fancy to one of the inflatable Aliens, which Mr X gave away to her.

Well done to Weeny Schnitzel, Premature Ejection, Stiff Meat, Windsock, Action Man, Tops, Mr X for getting through all of the Pubs.  Windsock & Panda would continue drinking back at the Peartree, tough they seemed to think it was a Gay bar in the early hours!

P.S. – Did anyone find Weeny’s plastic Mug?