Herts Hash Virtual Hash No.6
TBT OBE arrives with “Lovely day!” & it is as the Sun is out & it T-shirt weather! Canary Boy “Good morning!” ☀ Fliptop “No cheating today 😀” which was aimed at TBT OBE Kylie adds his thoughts (Google is banned!)
Kylie turns up with a “Morning, just putting my trainers on!” Lemming adds “You don't normally run!” which gets “Virtual hug for you as well Lemming!” from Kylie.
No Eye Deer show an educational background with “Present!” Sludge joins with “Good Morning all, G'Day if Rooted is on?” Lemming pipes up “Morning everyone!” Canary Boy quips “Only if there’s a beer stop 🍺!” Lemming says ”You don't normally run!”
Tent Packer who is several thousand miles away “Evening all!” FWB On! On! Mark E Mark Can't make today still on holiday The Hare ads “Nice day for it (And for a virtual Hash!)”
Kylie replied to Fliptop’s “Are you back at work?” “Yep, back in tomorrow for a run of 4 (lates and 12 hour nights)!” Fliptop adds “How's MILF?” Kylie informs us “She's much better, went out for a run yesterday. Thanks for asking!” The Hare ads “Glad Milf is happy as she’s getting over Corvid-19 🦠 🤸♀️”
Mother arrives with a “Guten morgen!” which puzzles Tent Packer “Am I in the right country?” Kylie replied to Mother Guten morgen? Sludge is Glad to see MILF is up and running
Zing-a-long-a-max looks out the window & says “It's gonna be a warm one!” to which Tent Packer replies It’s about 33 and very humid! The Hare says it’s almost the same over here... Fliptop Yep got some Water for Teddy today
Fliptop wonders what its like down in Oz asks “What's the temp in Perth Roo?” But there’s no reply for ages.
Canary Boy A man had three beautiful girlfriends but didn’t know which one to marry.
As a test he decided to give each women £5,000 to see how they would spend it.
The first girlfriend went out and got herself a complete makeover, She told him “I spent the money so I could look pretty for you because I love you so much”
The second went shopping and bought the man new golf clubs, an iPad and an 80-inch flat screen TV. She said “I bought these gifts for you because I love you so much”
The third women took the £5,000 and invested it in the stock market, doubled her investment, returned the £5,000 to the man and said “I’m re-investing the rest of the money for our future because I love you so much” m The man thought long and hard about how each of his girlfriends had spent the money, the he decided to marry the one with the biggest tits.
Lemming “Love you too!” Tent Packer “Can I have a hug?” Kylie replied to Tent Packer “I’ll take what I can get!” Mother was easy with it as she replied “Both - Virtual hug”
Time is getting on, a bit of watch tapping ⌚ before Fliptop calls the Circle on this lovely day ☀ Fliptop 4 mins to go! Kylie (as usual Fliptop's watch is out)
The Hare wonders that when the lock-down is over & we can Hash for real, will No Eye Deer be the Hare & will the weather change ☔ Fliptop is more concerned & gives out a Capt Mainwaringesque Order of “Will everyone please stop hugging Milf, Kyle is getting jealous! Tent Packer adds to it with “Aah that’s nice!”
Sludge reckons It's nice here! While Zing-a-long-a-max asks “Where is here, Sludge?” Flying Solo is more concerned about how much Shiggy is out on the trail? Scooter friendly? As the Girls have a challenge for the smoothest trail.... Kylie replied to Flying Solo “I think Ketchup must get that prize?”
Sludge Waiting for GM to call circle up - 11am, while Lemming jumps the gun with his enquiry “Is there places on the trail to hug?” Milf responds “Bless! I hope so!” Tent Packer Is there places? (to hug) Tent Packer fills us in on the Malaysian Lock down being extended ‘till the 12th May’ so sorry about your T shirts. Finally we get under way as Fliptop wakes up & startles the Circle with “OK good morning all and welcome to Herts V Hash 6. Our hare today is your very own Mr X.”
Zing-a-long-a-max is premature as he cries out “On! On!” then after a hiatus “Sorry too soon!”
The Hare states “For the majority its 🛴friendly!” Flying Solo replies “😍 Isabelle says scooters are so last year, But she's ready to go!” Kylie reckons Isabelle will need a piggy back? Which makes Flying Solo think “I will need a Down-Down if I have to carry her!” But being the Hash Mother quickly retorts “Can I have a piggy back?” Kylie jokingly says “Sure thing... I'll start getting fit now. 😘” Zing-a-long-a-max adds Miss Piggy(back)?
The conversation turns back to the usual Hash nonsense as No Eye Deer replied to Tent Packer’s Am I in the right country, with “Are you still stranded?” Tent Packer came back with “No trains home!” The Haberdashery raises its head again as Lemming adds “I need another t shirt now!” But Tent Packer is still in Langkawi, the geographically challanged Lemming ponders “Is that near London?” Tent Packer then adds “What size t shirt? Sure I can oblige sir.” All of which eats away at the time….
Fliptop’s grey-matter gets a kick as he says “Sorry forgot to welcome overseas visitors... Roo in Perth OZ?”
Sorry Roo bit it’s On to the Trail!
This week we start from outside of a Pub The Orange Tree, yes it’ll annoy My Lil’! We are in a town that does not appear in the Doomsday Book, yet it seems to have a medieval feel in places? Flying Solo will need these today 🕶️😆 Flying Solo I need 😎 in the midst of winter
Here we go, You have to decide whether to head away northward or southbound?
Zing-a-long-a-max has good eyesight as he claims that it looks like a cyclone is looming there, TP. After seeing a picture of Langkawi posted by Tent Packer, who adds No just wet wet wet! No Eye Deer warbles “I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes 🤣”
Canary Boy Been to Sark, lovely! It’s like going back in time.. Kylie replied It’s like going back in time.. Just hope you don't need an ambulance! Tent Packer asks is that where Sarcastic comes from
TBT OBE is actually up for the Trail as he asks “Anyone on?” just as up to the north of Norton Road there is a falsie for Milf, Fliptop, Wanktlers, Lemming, Kylie & FWB to find, while Down to the South of Norton Road the Trail is picked up by Zing-a-long-a-max Canary Boy 🙋♀️ & Flying Solo as she leads them down the suburban street for a few hundred yards until reaching a Check point by a side road of West Avenue off to the southwest, the options are to continue southward or search the southwest, or eastward down an old walled alleyway beside a grave yard 🪦? on the alleyway through to St Mary the Virgin
Milf is Checking & Sludge is panicking as he wonders “Anyone seen Flanders?” The Hare thinks others maybe missing & asks Is Mother there? Tent Packer thinks he knows where Mrs Mallett & the others maybe as he asks “Is there a virtual coffee shop?” This is soon confirmed as Flanders confesses “I'm in the virtual coffee shop with Mrs Mallet”
Meanwhile Wanktlers is having a 90’s throw-back as he states “E's are good!” (Shamen on you! – Ed] All the talk of Coffee makes Lemming think of food & he declares “Hold up need to get toast!” as if this was enough to slow the start of the Virtual R*n, Milf then chimes ion with “I need a wee wee 😜” No Eye Deer replied to her with “Already?” Tent Packer also has hunger pangs as he stops to warm up his char kuay teow (Chinese sausage, oyster sauce fried fish cake & noodles) Sis must be online as Fliptop says we are all taking in Too much caffeine! Then he asks Roo-Ted “Are you managing to keep up Roo Ted?”
Tent Packer gets back to the Trail & calls out “Are you?” Lemming now admits “I'm following this on Google maps but keep falling off the flat screen!”
A T is found by Mother & Lemming south toward a main B656 road, so it’s back to the alleyway, but as Wanktlers, TBT OBE, Sludge & Canary Boy that’s a Falsie as well! This leaves the south-western urban West Avenue side road to find arrows leading quickly up to the third Check of the morning, this one is by a Sports Ground, of the two options you can search the playing field to the south, or continue along the back street?
Roo-Ted final gets I on the act as he says “The sun has gone down and I can’t see the trail!” The Hare replies “It’s ok they have street lights on this section of Trail!” Kylie replied to Roo-Ted Use a torch! Roo-Ted claims that he’s In isolation so don’t have batteries! No sympathy from Tent Packer as he ribs Roo Ted with “Can’t you wind it up?” Lemming is being naughty as he wants to know “What did you use the batteries for?” Roo-Ted responds “I am old, You guess!”
Back to the Trail [Hoorah! – Ed] Fliptop decides “Back St for me .. checking!” this prompts Mother to reveal where her musical crush lies as she shrieks out “Back street boys!” Tent Packer is content with “Ah it’s the back street gang then!”
No Eye Deer has No idea who I am? Then Kylie asks “Where's Paul? Is he keeping cold and remote?” Tent Packer wants to know “Has Paul been allowed out?” No Eye Deer replies “He's in Sandy 😶doesn't use Facebook so can't join in!” Tent Packer claims he know where sandy is! Kylie reckons we need to get Whatever She Says to add it just for this, if not all the group's he could join like.... then in his best Doorman’s voice Wanktlers booms “He's not on the list, so he's not getting in!”
Those who venture in to the Avenue Park sports ground 🏏 ⚽ find the Dust & “On!” is called by Wanktlers & Canary Boy 🙋 While Zing-a-long-a-max is confused as he states “Oh no, I thought it was Wednesday?” Tent Packer quips “Not Hash Wednesday!” Milf says to Zing-a-long-a-max “Check the clock ⏰” Tent Packer It is all the same day this year No Eye Deer replied to Tent Packer Absolutely not . Mother asks What day is it? Roo-Ted panics with “Who is going to sign the book for me?” Kylie then adds “Shouldn't we have moved to Mondays by now?”
A nice trot along the green grassy expanse of Avenue Park Sport Field as the Trail turns south-eastward to come out through a small memorial garden & on to the main road, to the south a very large school 🏫 with a religious connotation 🏴 Knights Templar School can be seen, but from the Check here you have two options, north-eastward toward the centre of the Baldock old town or south-westward along the bottom of the outside of sports ground?
TBT misses his virtual sailing [Read virtual capsizing for that! – Ed] Kylie replied to TBT OBE Not much wind. Fortunately the subject is changed as Zing-a-long-a-max Nice pair of tits, as he posts a picture of two avians. Talking of which Canary Boy goes wrong, while No Eye Deer, Mother & Milf (.)(.)🏃♀️ find arrows away to the southwest on the Letchworth Road heading toward one of the major road arteries the A1(M) running through Hertfordshire
Sludge & Fliptop follow on but as No Eye Deer, Mother & Milf (.)(.)🏃♀️ reach a Care Home 👵 👴 by a road bridge a Bar Check is found, so safely away from the care home & its back 50 yards or so to find the Hare directing the Pack off northbound up an uncapped back passage of Pepys Way leading by the large detached homes 🏡 🏡 to the west & the Sports Ground on the east, out of the narrow lane to take a quick left to find a Check
The options now are to take to a Cycle 🚲 / 🦶 footpath to the west, or head around to the east & then southbound back toward the main road? FWB claims she is confused to which Milf replied “Easily done darling 🤣🤣“
Wanktlers is still singing to himself with 90’s classic Ebenezer Goode [Naughty! Naughty! Very Naughty! Tent Packer lets out Mrs Mallet has dribbled her coffee down a new t shirt Flanders No worries TP you have plenty more T shirts Mother Dirty girl Tent Packer I know!
Zing-a-long-a-max “On the way to the next SLAG heap?” Lemming wonders “Who's a slag?” Sludge demands “Speak for yourself! Zing-a-long-a-max then realises the type of banter being had & tells all of us “Don't let Pebbledash see you mentioned a back passage!” Meanwhile Tent Packer is having issues as he apologises “Sorry the squirrels are watching and I can’t go!”
While Canary Boy goes wrong. Fliptop is quick off the mark as he finds Trail On 🙋♀️ along the cycle route 🚲 & its ideal for 🛴, Mother, Milf are soon behind him as the path rises from up between the row of homes on Coachman's Lane 🏠 🏠 🏠 & then over an arching footbridge spanning the major arterial A1(M) road below, once on the western side the track comes down to a Check on a three way split north, south or southwest? Kylie is getting withdrawal symptoms & asks “Is it an old railway?”
Lemming "Canary Boy is puffing" Milf Sweat Tent Packer Is he a train Canary Boy Looking for a pub to get me breath back! 😂 Lemming Mines a pint ! Tent Packer adds "I am following Sludge for the shortest distance between two pints!" Mother questions Sludge as Tent Packer's witty comeback is "I’ve been watching the Crown and that’s how She would pronounce it!" Flanders comes out with "Slidge down the bank!" Sludge responds with "Slidge can't type either!" Fliptop points out " It's not a spolling test!" 😀
Wanktlers leads Fliptop, Tent Packer Lemming & Canary Boy (he’s falling for all the falsies so far!) on a Falsie, its down to Flying Solo 🏃♀️ to pick it up on the Southbound hard capped track taking you away through a wooded 🌲 🌳🌳area on the edge of Letchworth Industrial Estate, a slight diversion to the southwest & then back to head south-westerly before coming out through the bollards at the dead end of an old lane with a Roman name of Hadrian's Way as you are now lead down to the main Letchworth road, but instead of coming out on to the edge of this busy route, the arrows mark the way south-westerly old side road that runs parallel to the main drag of the A1(M).
Kylie is now concerned as he believes MILF's compass had thrown a wobbly?
You are now on the first long trot of this Trail, but after a hundred yards the homes 🏘️ make way to an industrial area 🏭 to the west, it’s a bit of a bland trot on the way becomes a dual carriageway the lights junction 🚦 for one of the main entrances to the Letchworth industrial/retail area, once over the first section of the Toucan Crossing 🚦 the next Check is found. Do you carry on along the main now called Baldock road to the southwest, or take the north-westerly access road among the units?
Fliptop, Milf, Mother & Lemming all go wrong to the northwest & find a T, Sludge leads the way to the southwest following on are Kylie, FWB, Zing-along-a-max & Tent Packer up to a Bar Check a fairway down the main Baldock road, so it’s back to find that the Hare has marked the Trail at the lights, this time at the toucan crossing 🚦 to the east side of the road, seemingly all that is on that side of the road is a bus stop but the Trail leads that way & turns southbound to pass the bus stop before taking to the wide verge once the tarmac end. Tent Packer has his pass out [Pebbledash I said Pass out! – Ed] “I’m taking the bus & best take it out now then!” he cries.
A jog 🏃 🏃♀️ along the grassy side of the road isn’t for long as to cheer up TBT OBE arrows direct the Hash through a gap in the thick hedgerow, yes a bit of ‘Trespassing’ to cheer him up, though technically it’s not really trespassing as there is a well walked dog-waking route around the farm field 🌾, though the Pack only have to cut across the farmed bit of the pointed south-western tip of the crop 🌾 field, this unofficial footpath comes out to a wider farm track, here lies the next Check point – your options are southwest of northeast on the hedged-in route.
Kylie shocks himself “I'm not normally out front!” 🏃 No Eye Deer replied to Kylie “That's the good thing about a virtual hash!” he’s not alone as No Eye Deer adds “I've run the whole way so far 😉!” FWB adds “Me too!” Milf has the final word on Kylie’s FRBing exploits with “On your a**e!”
Sludge claims his Finger is out of control [Whoa there Pebbledash! –Ed] & Mother is now tuned in to AC/DC, all of which inspire Wanktlers to bleat out an “Oh yeah!” Tent Packer shows his AC/DC knowledge by adding “Thunderstruck!”
Flying Solo goes off with FWB in the wrong direction to find a T! While Fliptop, Canary Boy & Lemming are On! to the Northeast on the dust bare-earthen farm track 🚜 leads the Hash on back toward the edge of the bigger of the roads encounter today A1(M), a CHK is found by the wider triangular turning place, your options are southward along the edge of a crop field, or through the wide underpass to the eastern side? Tent Packer wonders Passover & not pass under, Passover was a couple of weeks earlier!
Lemming sees a posted picture & asks “Who is the looker?” Tent Packer adds his comment on the new Haberdashery “Tie dye will always be “in”!” Lemming asks “Is that the new t shirt? Mother sees it & put’s her bid in with “I’ll have one! Tent Packer replies to Lemming “It is my boy!” & Wanktlers does a Del Boy impersonation coming out with Bulle de lumière!
Fliptop How are your new hips holding up Roo
Flanders claims she is now Joining trail with Mrs M, in order to walk off the cakes. Milf asks “Cake who said 🍰?” FWB adds 🧎have to stretching legs. I’ll catch up!” No Eye Deer is now fixated on the patisserie & adds “Would love some cake!” Tent Packer would now have the Pack believe that he & Mrs Mallett live like a Church mice as he claims “Mrs M is saving some crumbs for later, but she hasn’t spotted them yet!” Fliptop then comes out with “Just had choc chip cake hmmm. Testing it for Sis!”
Milf & Flying Solo have the sense not to follow FWB, Sludge, Mother & Lemming & they pick up the Trail out to the eastern side of the A1(M) & the Dust leads along the hedged-in footpath heading eastward along the southern end of different Sports Field 🏏, on the opposite side is the northern end of a nature reserve 🌳🌳🐝 🌼 , just as Milf & Flying Solo, with Fliptop start heading back into town they arrive at a Bar Check by the back of the homes on the south side, so back you go.
While Milf calls “On back!” Tent Packer now cries foul “My shoes are wet!” to which the Hare wonders has Tent Packer peed on his shoes for another week? Tent Packer smugly replies “At least they were my own shoes!” Flanders tries to make things awkward for Tent Packer by setting him the question “Are TPs shoes new ones?” Tent Packer is quick with a “Not now!” & Lemming harks back to the ‘Good old Days’ as he claims “No value to shoes now!” Wanktlers now cheers up Tent Packer with “At least you won't have to drink out of them!”
Zing-a-long-a-max is Halfway round he claims “I haven't a clue where I am!”” as the Hare has marked the Trail & sent Sludge, FWB, Mother & Lemming off in to the wooded section 🌳🌳 🌲 🌳🌳of the nature reserve by St Mary's Junior School to head southward, this route comes out in to the open area of wild grasses 🌾 which give way to a tree-line🌳🌳, once through this the Hash are out in to a large sized paddock home to a few equines 🐎 with the stables to the south, so the Trail sticks to the eastern side until reaching a small but dense wood, a CHK with two options is found within, your choices are southbound, or north-eastern within the wood🌳🌳.
FWB calls “On back!” but Mother is reluctant as she says “I'm staying in the woods its cooler!”
Fliptop can I let Teddy off lead? Tent Packer "I like Teddies" Teddy has to stay on the lead for now, FWB & Kylie go wrong, while 🙋♀️ Lemming, Wanktlers ♂️ Milf & are away 🏃 🏃♀️ to the northeast through the wood as it is squeezed to a tip by a school 🏫 playing field to the north & an old Baldock lane to the east as the Trail leaves the more rural area to head back to the edge of town. The old Baldock lane joins a main road & on the edge of the junction is a Check point, options are north, east or south, with the southern option being along the inside of the crop field that run opposite the homes 🏡 l🏡 lining the eastern edge of the Weston Way road. Tent Packer I’ll run the crop circle
Sludge is now bemused & wants to know How did Skip catch up? Mother reckons it due to him SCBing, as Skip adds “Just finished my bacon and egg!” Fliptop has noticed over the previous weeks that Skip is quite fast on Virtual trails 😀 while Tent Packer wonders where is Sparky? Kylie replies “Winding his phone up!” Flanders thinks she sussed Skips FRBing trick that he is skipping along. Soon the talk is back to drink as Milf replied to Mother “Coffee! Yes please BLACK!” Mother quips “Mine too!”
Taking the crop’s edge 🌾 as Tent Packer circles about in the crop 🌾 before getting back on the straight & narrow to follow Dust to where the Trail emerges through the tree-line 🌳🌳 🌲 & comes out on to a main capital London road running north to south, straight over the junction, it’s a lot easier with less traffic to get over to the Check on the eastern side of the road, you have three options, to the north toward the town, off up an old lane to the southeast, or southbound toward a ‘regency Pub’ ⚜️ 👑 the George IVthe choice is yours? Mother “Pub!”, Wanktlers “Pub please!””, Tent Packer “Pub!”, Kylie shouts “PUB!”, Flying Solo “Pub!”, FWB “Pub!”, No Eye Deer General consensus seems to be the “Pub!”, [What would Whatever She Says say? – Ed] L emming is the voice of reason as he points out “It will be shut!” [Can’t believe I said that about Lemming! – Ed] Wanktlers takes the news badly & replies with “That's right, ruin it for us!”
Tent Packer the points out that it’s a virtual pub so it will be virtuously open! Flanders points out to Lemming that virtual pubs are open 24/7! Canary Boy shouts out “IVE MADE IT TO THE BAR!” No Eye Deer is on Tent Packer side & as It’s a virtual pub so it will be virtuously open Will there be virtual drinks. I'm thirsty
Lemming bravely shouts out “In that case the first rounds on me!” Wanktlers is quick with “Get 'em in!” Mother asks “Is that a bar check Canary Boy?” Tent Packer reckons it is Pork scratching time? While the Her asks “Can you get Chicken Itching’s?” No Eye Deer replied Think there's a cure for that now! Something to do with injecting disinfectant asks Kylie from the Trump school of fiction
Nothing is found to the south, not even Sparky & his pal – just a shut Pub, a T is found to the north only leaves Lemming checking to the southeast, where this uphill route on an old rising rustic Chalk Hills lane is correct, Lemming calls “On!” 🙋♂️ it’s quite a steep climb up for Flying Solo to carry 🛴 in to the wooded ridge 🌳🌳 🌲 🌲 but there is chance of a respite at a small car park around three-quarters of the way up.
It’s time for the sweet stop, 🍬 🍭 earlier than would be on a real Trail, but it seems that on a virtual one with the Pack being stuck at home food comes to mind far too early! Lemming is kept away from the information sign of this historic area, don’t want him cheating! Teddy 🐕 can be let off for a bit
Off we go again & the options are to take to the woodland 🌳🌳🌳🌳, either by a northern path into the nature reserve, or climb up a few more feet to the northeast & enter the wood 🌳🌳🌳🌳 that way from the Chalk Hills car park?
Flying Solo is surprised that was a quick stop! Sludge doesn’t mind as he asks “I'll take a Tiger! Fliptop thinks Looks like a nice Oz shiraz Roo? Skip gets the Pack back to basics with “Need a pee. FWB 🍺🍺🍺!” [Think we are lucky he wasn’t going for an Eartha (Kitt)? – Ed]
Sadly 🙋♀️ Canary Boy gets it right, with 🙋♂️ Milf & they call On up to the higher level as the Trail now turns north-eastward along the top of the ridge, you have to pass through a kissing gate 💋 to reach the crop fields out over the east, he Trail hugs the 🌾 fields contour along the eastern side of the Weston Hills nature reserve, a place of SSI, as well as being carved out by chalk workings ⛏️ from roman times 🏺. The Bluebells are out in this section of woodland 🌼🌼 🌳🌳🌳🌳
The Hare realises that the emoji’s aren’t always coming to as desired & posts “Canary Boy, you seem to have found your feminine side by that emoji?” as he is next to the female image. Lemming loses Brownie points with “Canary Girl is it!”
Psycho now joins in with “Morning all managed 1st check now sunning myself in car park. 😃😎”
The Path takes the Pack along the top of an enclosed space, this Gibbet Hill area is named after the practise of executions in days of yore ☠️ , where criminals could be seen swinging high above the town below as a warning to be good. The Trail turns southward around the rectangle of the reserve that longhorn cattle 🐮are kept in from time to time, they keep some plants at bay, leaving it clear for 🐝 bee & pyramidal orchids & other wild flowers 🌾 🌼🌼 🌿 to thrive in the spring, which are visited by common blues 🦋 & marbled whites 🦋 for all you lepidopterists Time for a Photo Shoot 🤳
Skip is now worried “Has Sludge been left behind again?
A turn to the south leads along the hedge & up to another Kissing Gate 💋, Milf (.)(.)will be having a field day as its time to pucker up again! After all of the 💋 💋💋💋💋💋 a Check is found back inside the woodland 🌳🌳🌳🌳 options are east along the level, south down a steep drop or west along the level, the choice is yours
Sludge reckons it’s time to head back to the Pub, Wanktlers claims there's the ACDC one!
Milf(.)(.) is not worn out by the kissing 💋, as western choice is correct, she calls “On!”🙋♀️ While Wanktlers & Tent Packer have to regain the lost height! Flying Solo, Kylie & Mother are called back too. Now TBT OBE & Sparky have to watch out for the old tree roots that stick out along the meandering footpath Ops too late over goes TBT OBE!
The route begins to drop slightly before reaching another Check point in the reserve, your choices are now to continue westward, or drop down southward through the more open area where the spindle bushes lie in wait, they’re scratchy little buggers & unlike nettles they can get you all year around!
The Trail now leads you on north-eastward up to a footpath leading out of a Kissing gate 💋 in an almost tunnel like corner of the hawthorn hedgerow, (.)(.)Milf 💋 is puckered up again, only to options east out through the Kissing Gate 💋 or west down the northern end of the reserve?
Sadly 🙋♀️ Canary Boy gets it right, with 🙋♂️ Milf & they call On up to the higher level as the Trail now turns north-eastward along the top of the ridge, you have to pass through a kissing gate 💋 to reach the crop fields out over the east, he Trail hugs the 🌾 fields contour along the eastern side of the nature reserve, a place of SSI, as well as being carved out by chalk workings ⛏️ from roman times 🏺. The Bluebells are out in this section of woodland 🌼🌼 🌳🌳🌳🌳
Tent Packer is worried with all this kissing, and all from two metres, most impressive! Tent Packer then reckons watching all the puckering up is going to Spoil my dinner! But he rallies around as he declares “I’m behind Mother!” who lets out an “Ooh, err!” Kylie is now getting excited as he replied to Tent Packer “Me too. Are we in the bun contest again?”
Out toward the east is an open field that hold a secret deep beneath & there is only a Falsie for Fliptop to find! So, Skip & Wanktlers🙋♂️ lead the way to the west it is on to the footpath heads to the north-western corner of the reserve, which then becomes an old route, uncapped to begin it’s a stony & has tree-lines 🌲 🌲 🌳🌳on either side, its name is derived from the old practice of producing Quick-Lime. Almost at the end of the decent the Limekiln Lane path joins its tarmac namesake on the elbow of the bend from the entrance of mobile-homes park. Tent Packer asks is it "Eaton Bray Lime kilns?"
Flying Solo is impressed as there is a lot of kissing on this trail, the Hare ads that they are a friendly bunch.
The Trail leads you out to a main South road in town, there a Check has three options, southwest toward a roundabout, north-westward up the suburban street 🏘️ of an almost hidden alleyway footpath at the corner end of a red brick wall 🧱 almost opposite the check, or north-westward to an area of town that was once a medieval leper colony 🤕 on what was known as Pesthouse lane 🐀 🏚️ on Clothall Common! The choice is yours…
3D is worried & asks “Hope no glandular fever!” While Flying Solo exclaims “Leper colony! Flying Solo Does hand sanitizer protect from leprosy?” Mr X adds it depends if the appendages are still attached! Fliptop gets in on a Trumpism with “Only if injected!” 3D then states Yes it does! [Some wonder how she knows this, in the online Monday Quiz she set with Slug, we found out with all of the virus questions in round one! – Ed]
Ewok now pops up with “Hello everyone- just passing, can’t stop. Love to all. On! On!” Kylie replied to Ewok Coincidentally, we’re Just talking about the bun competition!! Wanktlers chimes in with “It's the Peachy Bottoms!” Mother now wonders “Ware oh ware!” & FWB “Where is where?”
No Eye Deer claims “Got some catching up to do!” as Fliptop notices someone is quiet & asks “Is TBT still with us??” Tent Packer is now concerned “Did anyone pick him up after he tripped?” & thankfully Milf says “Yes” Kylie hits the nail on the head with “He's busy googling (cheating)
For Mother its getting a bit much & she’s getting tired now! The Hare adds these words of encouragement after being asked “where's the pub?” he adds “You’re nearly home, only a couple more checks to go!” This picks the Pack’s spirits up!
Lemming goes wrong, dragging lots of the Pack in his wake, while alleyway bears fruit for Fliptop, No Eye Deer benefits from the rest going wrong to the old Leper home she begins what is a straight run before emerging out on to Pinnocks Lane back street in town, your choices are south-eastward toward the Old High street north-westward by an area of new builds 🏠 on the left & bungalows 🏠 on the right, or finally to the northeast an street that starts off with older Victorian homes that give way to early 20th Century & finally a few new builds 🏘️?
Mother [states the obvious (Lemming told me to say that)! –Ed] by claiming “I'm clueless!” No Eye Deer admits that it could be anywhere? 3D is obviously feeling it as she lets out a large “Phew!”” [I hope that’s a sigh? – Ed]
Tent Packer is losing his ability to type as he guesses where were are “Watered!” then a pause before “ I mean waterend!” Skip (doesn’t know how close he is when he says) Baldock beckons. Kylie says “I'm trailing along near the back.” Zing-a-long-a-max then says that “I'll wait for you to mark the check!” No Eye Deer must be being bothered by pests as she wants to know “How come wasps can find their way into a house but not the way back out!!” [Lemmings are like that in Pubs – Ed] Mother still has no idea? On getting to the start of the Hash Psycho wonders “Did I only drive a few miles north today? 😃” Lemming, No Eye Deer & Sludge think No! Just run him over. 3D A few miles south for me!
Tent Packer is now panicking “My car park ticket is running out!” No Eye Deer replied “Traffic wardens are still working so be careful!” Tent Packer thinks that they are probably an Essential service.
Lots of calling back from the Hare as everyone seems to have gone wrong! Its off toward the northwest the Trail is found on the second time of looking, the Pack pass by the bungalows & at the end of the back street a playing field is found – look out for 🌈 in the windows, in this southern corner a Check is found – now your options are northwest on a tarmac footpath at the western edge of the sports ground ⚽ due north across the grass toward another area of housing, or to ruin the edge of the playing field ⚽to head over to the main road way over in the northeast?
3D wants Cake and coffee for end of trail! [She’ll be disappointed! –Ed] FWB is also Hungry! One benefit of the Virtual Hash for Psycho was its been good to catch up with Mrs Mallett over a cup of thermos coffee in the car park. ☕☕xx
While the rest are scattered out in the field. Fliptop & Teddy 🐕 find the arrows in the north-western corner of the playing field, where arrows point the way to the southwest though an old alleyway out between a couple of 16th Century buildings to come out on to a very wide High Street you are now led to a zebra crossing to the south-western side.
A Check is found, the choices are to the south sits large Art Deco building now Tesco but once was the Bondor Building, it’s influenced by the 1920’s Egyptology, the Rolling Stones 🎸 💋 once played an early gig there, but it’ll always be known for hosiery & WWII 🪂 Parachutes. Or through a passageway through the high street shops to the housing behind, or turn north-westward to run on by a few Pubs & many restaurants 🥢 👳 🍕? Fliptop quizzes one of the Pack with “Nothing like a well fitted bra eh Milf?” Psycho sees the takeaways & asks for French & fries please 😝😛
Lemming now looses more Brownie Points as he asks “Can someone explain to Mother what essential services are please!” No Eye Deer jumps to Mother’s defence with “Don't put up with him mother! Kylie adds his tuppenceworth to Lemming “Dustmen, not solicitors. 😁” 3D ten calls out Balls! [No idea in what context that was made? – Ed]
Wanktlers now has a long walk as he says I'll meet you at the Garden City Brewery & looks like he’s being joined by Zing-a-long-a-max Garden city brewery? That's where I am going. Vegan beers 🍻
Mother & Milf who headed north-westward find the Trail as it runs behind the large hotel on the end of the High Street, the reason for so many hotels & Inns is that you are now on an old Coaching 📯 route when this Market Town was established.
FWB Back to pubs and restaurant to drink and eat The Hash are led over another zebra crossing before being turned south-westward along by the façade of another hotel, at the end of the large red brick George hotel a footpath is found, arrows direct you in to the ⛪ Churchyard of St Mary's to the north. A Check is found by the southern transept (The sticky out cross bits of a Church) of the religious building ⛪ with its tall distinctive spire, something that can still be seen for miles around. The Pack are nearly home, so is it eastward or westward at the Church ⛪?
While Wanktlers, Milf & Skip fall foul of a Falsie, the Trail is picked up by Fliptop, Sludge on the short eastern option to come down the stone steps & on to the aptly Church Street to head north-westward where older market town homes sit, you reach a crossroads & the Hare is showing some benevolence as the Trail turns left & then crosses over to run through the site of the old town Brewery, sadly it was closed in 1904 after being bought by Wells & Winch Ltd, here the On Inn is found & it’s back to the Pub. Flanders asks “Was that the Tranters Brewery in days of old?” [It wasn’t, that was on White Horse Lane)
Where have you been virtually Hashing today?
Flying Solo “Baldock!” Fliptop is second with “Orange Tree?” So taken by the Trail was Flying Solo that she added “I might go try this out this afternoon!”
Flying Solo is correct Baldock it is
Knights Templar’s School
Letchworth Business Park
Sparky’s Pal - George IV
Chalk Hill Nature Reserve
Tesco, which was the Bondor Building (Rolling Stones played there)
Baldock is named in old French after Bagdad by the Knights Templars
The Baldock Brewery
St Mary the Virgin
Hope you enjoyed this (again)?
Fliptop Thanks for a well timed trail Mr X Flying Solo Great job Mr X Lemming Nice one Mr X. Knackered now
No Eye Deer Bit concerning that the turnout is better on a virtual hash. Perhaps this is the way forward. Save on petrol 🤗